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a.l.
Regular Member


Date Joined Apr 2006
Total Posts : 279
   Posted 1/4/2007 7:49 PM (GMT -6)   
Today should have been a really nice day- I went to a quaint little area with my mom, sister, and daughter (who is home from college for semester break). We went into some nice shops and to a terrific restaurant.  But, with all that is going on, I was very anxious (though I think I did a good job of "faking") and found it very difficult to enjoy the day.  I tried to convince myself to be "living in the moment" but did not succeed too well... And, then, the minute I pull into my driveway, REALITY really hits me and I'm back to square one... (actually my husband is doing a temp job tonight from midnight to 8 am, so he was sleeping most of the day and now he is watching a movie before he leaves for work- I feel like we are becoming somewhat disconnected, though on the surface we are trying really hard to keep each other positive- I guess my feelings are understandable, but I'm worried that they may continue to build up and make me feel even worse- guess it's probably time to make a therapist appointment again- I just feel like I'm already "talked out" and until our employment/financial situation changes, my mood will remain the same...
Has anyone tried a support group for mood disorders? I'm wondering if something like that would be helpful to me.

jordaNZone
Veteran Member


Date Joined Sep 2006
Total Posts : 752
   Posted 1/5/2007 12:21 AM (GMT -6)   
 
Hi a.l
Somehow you need to desensitise yourself from what's going on around you at present...hmm my distraction methods include jigsaws, drawing, gardening, red wine - nah just kidding on the last one lol. It's probably not even your husband that's really annoying you it's just the frustration of not having jobs and being so unsettled just now eh?
Have you any job prospects yet? Sanity is usually regained with me when I have a purpose and 'working' fits the bill nicely.
Going to therapy is a cool idea...because you will be able to brush up on some skills to get through this rough patch.
Yay that your husband has some temp work..that's womderful news eh?
Try and stay a little positive..start caring about you...treat yourself to something nice today..it doesn't have to be expensive just nice!
Maree

hopefulmigrainer
Veteran Member


Date Joined Oct 2006
Total Posts : 902
   Posted 1/6/2007 1:40 PM (GMT -6)   
Hi a.l. I know what you mean about "faking it." But, their is a saying "fake it until you make it." You WILL get through this. I attend a support group for depression/anxiety at my church. It's like this only in person and you will make friends who truly understand and that will take the pressure off of the people in your life who don't understand. Hope you feel better soon. Hang in there.
Kelly
"God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference. Amen."
 
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a.l.
Regular Member


Date Joined Apr 2006
Total Posts : 279
   Posted 1/6/2007 2:07 PM (GMT -6)   
Thanks, Kelly!! Yes, it is better for me to fake it than to drown in self-pity. And hopefully if I keep faking it, I will become the person that others think I am!!
Anyway, did you have that temp job this week? How did it go??
Thinking of you...

Rock50
Regular Member


Date Joined Nov 2006
Total Posts : 264
   Posted 1/6/2007 8:43 PM (GMT -6)   
a.l.
While you think you are faking it you really are not. It is the real you that is coming out when you are doing that. It's really not faking, you are forcing responses and converstions because you simply do not feel like talking. You have so much going on and you just really don't feel good. It is normal to feel down with so much going on around you. As you and I have talked before, it is just not good to swim in it for very long. I can tell from talking with you that you have what it takes to get through this. Like all things it just takes work. You have to make yourself be positive and that will last for a little while and then you will find yourself slipping back into a sad state. But if you will continue to force a positive attitude it will get longer and longer with each episode. Please try a couple of times a day to focus on all the positive things you have on your side. I can tell a winner from a loser and you are definitley a winner. Just keep going back at it and in no time you will find you are in a good mood most of the day. Again, do not get discouraged when you look up and you are down, it's natural.

I was glad to see you on the Chronic Pain site and it really made my evening to hear from you. As far as doctors are concerned they are only taught how to dispense narcotics and know nothing about getting someone off them. By the way what is your husband taking Gabapentin for. I just had a doctor ask me to try it for a mood stabilizer while I Kick these Narcotics. Just wondering what they have him on that for? Remember a.l. we cannot unring a bell. Try to quit worring about what has happened and concentrate on the future and how mcuh better it is going to be. Just give me one smile while your reading this. Still not feeling to well so I am going to lay down for awhile. I'll be back later this evening.

KEEP THE FAITH

ERIC

a.l.
Regular Member


Date Joined Apr 2006
Total Posts : 279
   Posted 1/6/2007 11:03 PM (GMT -6)   

Eric- here's that smile tongue   Your pep talk was great, as usual!!

Actually, I went on a few errands with my daughter this evening, including the supermarket, and I realized when I came out of the supermarket that I had not had any anxiety the whole time I was in there (over an hour!) Then we came home and made dinner and dessert and played a board game with my husband and son- had some good laughs! I am thankful for the time tonight that I felt a little better.

Tomorrow our local newspaper has  "mega jobs" section, so I am hoping that my husband and I find some ads to respond to (have seen nothing on monster and careerbuilder lately).

Anyway, my husband was put on gabapentin for nerve pain. He fell and broke his back about 15 years ago and still has pain from that. He also has bulging discs and arthritis in his spine, with pain that radiates down his leg. Unfortunately, he has put on some weight since he has been out of work and I'm sure this is causing extra abdominal strain- but I wouldn't dare bring that up to him now. The pain management doc and the acupuncturist both suggested gabapentin- I don't know how much it actually helps him, but it does seem to keep him out of severe pain.  He also takes tylenol a couple of times a day, but I want him to talk to the doc about that- I know too much can cause liver damage.

Well, hoping you got some good rest and are feeling better!!!


Rock50
Regular Member


Date Joined Nov 2006
Total Posts : 264
   Posted 1/7/2007 1:38 AM (GMT -6)   
No big pep talks but please look at the trip to the supermarket and the following night. Please focus on that a lot becuase you have the power to have a good time like that 99% of the time. Just put a little work into it and it will happen. You are the one who controls your life. You should be very proud. Go get'em girl.

Keep The Faith
Eric
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