Extremely stressful living situation...

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Twiggygal
Veteran Member


Date Joined Sep 2006
Total Posts : 924
   Posted 2/3/2007 8:09 PM (GMT -6)   
Sorry I haven't been around... things have been terrible.
 
I live with my father and mother right now...and ever since I came back from Florida in August things just seem to get worse with my father day by day.
 
He despises me... screams at me everyday about anything possible thing he can think of, and it's wearing down my mental state.  It's not healthy, and I've broken down too many times to count this week.  It's depressing and I hate it.  I can't even cry anymore.
 
I am moving out March 1st with my sister and her fiance because they too, can't handle the stress he is causing all of us.
 
I just can't take it anymore, he makes the panic worse.  One night he screamed for four hours and even told my mother to leave and I had to sit in my driveway for an hour and came back in, hoping he had stopped and hadn't and I was in tears and my sister was near tears and the next day I had an awful panic attack and felt like I was on the verge of mental insanity.
 
This can't be healthy.  In fact, I've decided it isn't healthy, and so I'm moving out.  I try to be SO nice to him ALL the time and nothing is ever good enough and he still hates me and hates that I'm his loser daughter with panic disorder.
 
If I MENTION my panic disorder he just snorts and dismisses it as something I made up.  He is completely insensitive and I can't handle my living situation anymore.  Some days I consider ways of how to keep away from him or what I'd do if he comes after me... what weapon might be near if he tries to go after me like he did before I moved out when I was 16.
 
Just thought I'd keep you all updated.
 
Twiggygal~
"Be glad of life because it gives you the chance to love and to work and to play and to look up at the stars."

DX: Panic Disorder, Depression, TMJ (Temporomandibular Joint Disorder), Chronic Migraines
 
RX: Lorazepam (1 MG a day), Lexapro (20 MG a day), Tylonel for the TMJ and Migraines
 
 
 
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normalsnofun
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Date Joined Oct 2005
Total Posts : 2500
   Posted 2/3/2007 8:22 PM (GMT -6)   
Hugs sorry you are dealing with this...Hope things start to look up for you. Hang in there...we are here for you.
--Michelle
Moderator Anxiety/Panic Forum

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"The best way out is always through. ~Robert Frost~

Our greatest glory is not in never falling but in rising every time we fall.
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Junebug05
Veteran Member


Date Joined Sep 2006
Total Posts : 717
   Posted 2/3/2007 9:45 PM (GMT -6)   

Twiggy,

I'm so sorry that things are tough for you right now.  I agree that the situation is not healthy for you and am glad to hear that you will be moving!  It makes it so much harder to take care of yourself and deal with your panic issues when you have so much stress all around you.  I've been there before and know what that's like.  You hang in there and I hope that things will calm down for you until you can move. 

Take care of yourself the best you can!


freezinginAK
Veteran Member


Date Joined Nov 2006
Total Posts : 1052
   Posted 2/4/2007 3:35 AM (GMT -6)   

  Twiggy girl I feel so sorry for you as you try and try so hard to better yourself, and yet you get put down that way, you really need to move out with your sister and be in a more poss. place you don't need that kind of neg. in your life That's why I love living this far from family no input from them and if times are tough I can allways feed my family with moose meat as they are allway's around here but you didn't hear that from me lol

  You are one of the best hearted women I know and you need to be you even with your anxiety and yet you still try hard to better yourself and help others so I tip my hat off to you girl and your one that I can say as well as Lyn that you can COWGIRL UP and move on with your life for the better.  

  Cowboy up


Howlyncat
Elite Member


Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 2/4/2007 3:50 PM (GMT -6)   
Twiggy my friend above there has said it so well .You will move on and YOU willl "Cowgirl Up " You are a
STRONG, GIVING,LOVING, CARING AND EMPATHETIC LADY...........
Family can destroy you or make you sweetie if they dont get it they play on the fact they think you are " acting up " if they do see what a/p can do to you ( my case ) They play on it and go for the juglar seems my family isnt happy unless I have gaping holes and IV's hanging out of me but you know what hun I took a couple of days to regroup I had to I was no good to any of u as I was no good to me and I needed to search find and destroy the beggars that were haunting me and it took all the strength, tears, sadness ,pity and self digging I could muster and it took my spirituality to new heights actually bringing me back into tune with it as well I brought a piece of each of you on my journey .........
I varied in weakness to being strong and okay to going back under blankets BUT
This morning I got up and I was ALIVE.............
I got to see the snow yes lots of it but so beautiful fresh and clean and it made me realize I was so akin to that snow
I started today as the snow fresh and clean untouched and not harmed a totally different outlook on my life my illnesses and my future........
I know you will do the same sweetie you have it in you I have seen the crap you have gone thru I know what you have been dealt ( not all I am sure) and yet there is always "Twiggy" there to help out those crying out here in need of support or just a friendly hello......
WHY.......
Cuz she has got Kahoonas and she has the ability to get past all of this and look back and say phft what was I thinking ......and you will get thru it sweetie I know this and so do you
The possibilities before you are endless as Dave said you dont need this negative crap in your life it will hurt to leave your mom but it will be better in the long run for you
I have come to see that we have to help ourselves first and then help out others not be unkind yet know our limits see that our needs are met so when we give to those on here we care about so dearly we are not short changing them we are giving them our all ..........yet keeping our self intact ya know ......
You will make it hun you know where I am and I had to go thru a lot to be back here today but I missed you all each of you .........
You are always in my heart and I will just keep good thoughts and a positive vibes going for you
I am here if ya need me hun k..cowgirl up sweetie and move on......
Luvs ya
Cowgirl Up......AGAIN.........
Lyn


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 Never compromise your self nor your dignity... 
 Dream, Reach and Believe ......
               
                             
 Co Mod @ Crohns                                     
 Moderator@ Alzheimer's 
 Moderator @ Anxiety/Panic
 
 
                                  
                          
                                  

Post Edited (Howlyncat) : 2/4/2007 1:54:00 PM (GMT-7)


Twiggygal
Veteran Member


Date Joined Sep 2006
Total Posts : 924
   Posted 2/4/2007 3:58 PM (GMT -6)   
Thanks you guys..

last night I was told I don't have a choice now... I have to move out...

oh well...

not like that would have changed my plans any.


TIME TO MOVE ON and try to clear my mind as Lyn said. *HUGS* thanks you guys.

I hadn't been around in a week cuz I was trying to put my mind back together... ugh I think it's stlil in pieces lol

TG~
"Be glad of life because it gives you the chance to love and to work and to play and to look up at the stars."

DX: Panic Disorder, Depression, TMJ (Temporomandibular Joint Disorder), Chronic Migraines
 
RX: Lorazepam (1 MG a day), Lexapro (20 MG a day), Tylonel for the TMJ and Migraines
 
 
 
Help support Healing Well and its' forums and chatrooms... donate today.... http://www.healingwell.com/donate/


Howlyncat
Elite Member


Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 2/4/2007 4:18 PM (GMT -6)   
You will do it hun I know ya will
Your HW family is here for ya okay
Luvs ya
    Contribute today to support Healing Well Forums...Donate @
 
 
 Never compromise your self nor your dignity... 
 Dream, Reach and Believe ......
               
                             
 Co Mod @ Crohns                                     
 Moderator@ Alzheimer's 
 Moderator @ Anxiety/Panic
 
 
                                  
                          
                                  

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