Hi Georgiak and wecome back to HW
I really don't feel that you are going crazy but more that your anxiety is just getting the better of you right now and I'm glad to see that you are getting help for it. I sometimes feel the same way having anxiety and diabetes as I got a broken blood vesal in my in my upper calf and it looks like one big bruse with spider vains all around it first thing I though was oh God there going to have to cut my leg off!!!!!!!!! But at this point I feel that you are just being hypersensitive to how you are feeling with your anxiety and ocd just try to remember to breath and do your relaxation therapy and you will get though this so Cowgirl up.
I understand your feelings of going insane, or losing it completely, I've had that too and sometimes it does creep back and I start to wonder again. I've had panic disorder for 17 years, sometimes it's been out of control and other times it's been gone for long periods of time, it always seems to be a very back and forth kind of thing. Just know that in all those years that I've been going through this, and all the times I was paralysed with fear that I'd go insane, I never did. I was told that people who are going insane don't know that they are and don't care that they are...you are aware of your surroundings and what you are feeling, and even go looking for clues that you're losing it and you most definitely care by having such strong feelings about it, so I just don't believe that you have anything to worry about with this. I know that is easier said than done!!! People with panic disorder don't go crazy, although it is a common fear. Take a couple of deep breaths and use your cbt to get this setback under control...hang in there, you will be just fine!!!!
I totally understand the way you are feeling just now..but the good news is that you already have the skills to work through this because you have beaten it before..yay! Start breathing deeply when those 'ick' feeling set in, distract your thinking patterns..going to the restroom was a good idea - you managed to pull yourself together and that was great - well done!
You won't go back to square one because you have already been there...this is just like a little reminder to be kind to yourself Have you ever seen the book 'Living with IT' by Bev Aisbett it's a fantastic book and has helped me greatly over the years - I can recommend it 100%
Take good care.