Here's what I heard:
1. You've had anxiety for years.
2. It's been a stressful, traumatic year
3. You've just gone through quite an ordeal missing work, a failed surgery, severe pain, a trip to the ER in the middle of the night and more surgery.
4. You felt the pressure of an important trip hanging in the balance, not knowing from one day to the next if you should go. You've been experiencing severe worry.
5. You're sleep deprived.
So physically and emotionally you've been though a lot. Those of us with anxiety disorders seem to get caught off guard and before we know it, we've escalated into a period of severe anxiety. The thought patterns that helped get us there in the first place acclerate rapidly to the point where we experience full blown panic. It's worry gone wild.
What is it you're worried about? If you just think logically, does it make rational sense for you to be worried about going on this trip? I doubt it. So one part of your mind is screaming for you to dig in and hide where it's safe (even though it won't be), while the another part of your mind KNOWS that the first is illogical. So you have to make a choice. Stay at home, miserably hating yourself for allowing irrational thoughts to ruin a good thing for you and your husband - or decide that despite the pain you're going to step out, and take a risk. You can't control your brain, but you can control your decisions.
Assuming your doc says it's ok for you to travel, I can see no reason why you shouldn't go. YOU NEED TO GET OUT OF YOUR HEAD! GO! Let the sun shine on your face! Drink in the sights never before seen - notice the details. Feel the floor under your feet. Love your husband. There are good things REGARDLESS of how you feel!
Now that part of your brain system is worked up, it may take some time to come back down. Has your doc prescribed any meds that could help quiet the illogical feelings (Xanax, Klonopin, etc)? Now would be an appropriate time to use them. Visit a trusted counselor and talk it out.
So hit the road! We'll see you when you get back. : )