Permanently Unstable?

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Silver Artemis
Regular Member


Date Joined Jun 2007
Total Posts : 79
   Posted 6/24/2007 1:10 AM (GMT -6)   
I've been living with a chronic illness for seven years now and have been hospitialized for it on more than one occasion. When I first stayed in the hospital the disease got out of control and I slowly began to die. The pain became so intense that I began to lose control over my mental state. I would stare at the ceiling for hours while speaking gibberish and talking to people that weren't there. I was almost catatonic and was so far gone from reality that I looked soulless.
0Now that I've gotten better, I've found that my paranoia problems have increased. There are days where I can't leave my home for fear of being attacked or stalked, I purposely isolate myself from everyone else because I just want to be left alone. Even seeing my own parents is cause for me to pray that they won't come and talk to me because I prefer to stay curled up in a ball under my blankets. So now I'm truly beginning to wonder, could that traumatic experience when I was eleven done something to damage my mental state even more? (I've been paranoid all my life, but it's gotten worse over the years) And if so, what can I do if the situation is just going to continue to deterioate?
Don't play leapfrog with a unicorn. Sea horses are the devil incarnate. Triangles can and will steal your soul given the opportunity.
*I've had Crohn's since I was eleven (that's seven years!)


stkitt
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 6/24/2007 8:41 AM (GMT -6)   

Good Morninig Silver,

I am so sorry that things are so tough for you. You did not share what your illness is so I will answer without that information, OK?

Psychotherapy is the most promising method of treatment for Paranoid Personality Disorder.

People afflicted with this disorder have deep foundational problems that necessitate intense therapy. A confident therapist-client relationship offers the most benefit to someone with the disorder.

People with paranoid personality disorder rarely initiate treatment and often terminate it prematurely. Likewise, building therapist-client trust requires great care and is complicated to maintain even after a confidence level has been founded.

Can trauma cause your problems, I cannot answer that with a yes or no. In somecases it could be possible depending on the trauma.

Bless you and atay with us.

 

 


Respectfully
Kitt
Moderator Anxiety ~ Panic Disorders
Dx: Anxiety/Panic, Depression 
______________________________________________________
"If you doubt you can accomplish something, then you can’t accomplish it. You have to have confidence in your ability, and then be tough enough to follow through.” 
~Rosalyn Carter


TammyGrl0528
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jun 2007
Total Posts : 1345
   Posted 6/24/2007 2:33 PM (GMT -6)   
Silver...can I ask, is it the Chron's that put you in the hospial? I am sorry I don't have an answer to your question, yet only a question of my own!
Dealing with panic and anxiety for 8 years off and on...right now more on than off.  Major health anxiety as well!
 
New found issues with agoraphobia...working on that too.
 
I am NOT weak, I am just down right now.  I am doing what it takes to get my life back!!!
 
Best Wishes to all...Tammy


Silver Artemis
Regular Member


Date Joined Jun 2007
Total Posts : 79
   Posted 6/24/2007 4:01 PM (GMT -6)   
Yes, it was the Crohn's that put me in the hospital and having to suffer so much at the young age of eleven was really traumatic so that may be part of my problem.
Don't play leapfrog with a unicorn. Sea horses are the devil incarnate. Triangles can and will steal your soul given the opportunity.
*I've had Crohn's since I was eleven (that's seven years!)


TammyGrl0528
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jun 2007
Total Posts : 1345
   Posted 6/24/2007 6:33 PM (GMT -6)   
Thank you for answering hun. The reason I ask is because my Mom has had Chron's since she was 16. She has been hospitalized from it several times, infact the last time was last September, and she is still recovering from it to this very day. It has been a long, hard recovery for her, and for us, the family as well. My Mom seemed to compare to you as well when ti comes to staring at the ceiling and speaking gibberish...so on and so forth. I am sorry you had to go through that at all, let alone, at such a young age. My heart truly goes out to you. Again, no words of advice for you, and I apologize for that. I just wanted to tell you that I am hear with you, feeling what you are feeling, only from the outside view! I wish you all the best!
Dealing with panic and anxiety for 8 years off and on...right now more on than off.  Major health anxiety as well!
 
New found issues with agoraphobia...working on that too.
 
I am NOT weak, I am just down right now.  I am doing what it takes to get my life back!!!
 
Best Wishes to all...Tammy


ChristianWithHope
Regular Member


Date Joined Sep 2006
Total Posts : 119
   Posted 6/24/2007 10:55 PM (GMT -6)   
Silver - I know this. Your odds of getting better go WAY up when you're actively taking healthy steps. Even small, incremental steps will eventually add up to something significant.

Right now, your mind is not your best advocate. You need a caring, professional partner that will take you by the hand and lead you OUT. Staying curled up under the covers is death - and I think inside you know that. When we go through traumatic times, and finally find a ray of hope or a bit of relief, we hang on to it for dear life - because we don't want to go back to the bad place. Even if it means isolating ourselves.

You need other humans that you can open your soul to - people that are also suffering.

The great news is that you're very young. Many of us here have wasted many years of our lives in denial and ignorance. You on the other hand, have great potential and already recognize some of the destructive behaviors in your life.

Silver - develop a plan - even if there's only one line on it. Take some steps that you know are good - regardless of how uncomfortable they are.

Come on - don't you dare give up! We're cheering for you!

Silver Artemis
Regular Member


Date Joined Jun 2007
Total Posts : 79
   Posted 6/24/2007 11:25 PM (GMT -6)   
This is a really big step for me seeing as how I absolutely detest asking for help or even admitting that I'm having a problem. Although my family and friends are very supportive I have always been one to try and solve my problems on my own even if it doesn't work out in my favor. This isn't a life, being paranoid all the time and wondering if the people you care about really are there for you and not just being fake. It's not healthy, it's not natural, and with the added stress of having to start college here soon I'm so afraid I'll have another nervous breakdown and be completely unable to function.
Don't play leapfrog with a unicorn. Sea horses are the devil incarnate. Triangles can and will steal your soul given the opportunity.
*I've had Crohn's since I was eleven (that's seven years!)


ChristianWithHope
Regular Member


Date Joined Sep 2006
Total Posts : 119
   Posted 6/25/2007 10:53 PM (GMT -6)   
Ok...so up and at em. What's your plan? Tell me some intentional actions you're going to take starting today.

Going to college can be very stressful - BUT WOW - the opportunities! You will find lot's of people struggling - and lot's of people wanting to help!

Will you be moving away from home?
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