Doctor Phobias? I have re-entered Panic Disorder and Anxiety after years of remission

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HorsesHealme
Regular Member


Date Joined Jul 2007
Total Posts : 22
   Posted 7/5/2007 7:28 PM (GMT -6)   
I just wonder if any one can relate to me, and I know someone can but I feel alone so I have to ask. I feel crazy because right now I just have a regular internal medicine doctor who thinks I am nuts. Here is the situation with me: I was diagnosed when I was 18 or 19 to have severe panic disorder, generalized anxiety and borderline personality , although they did try to give me the bipolar trap I do not fit the criteria. They thought I should not be able to have any type of stress at any time that I would always go ballistic. At any rate, I was put on zoloft and neurontin and various unhelpful sleep aids. The zoloft gave me my life back completely I was able to finish college while employed the whole time in very high stress jobs never much of a blink. I thought it might be a good idea after 4ish years to give my brain a break I think it was a bad idea. I ahd another year of OK...then last year at the doctors office it all started again out of no where. I am terrified of doctors, blood pressure machines and dentists now and for no apparent reason. It is horribly embarassing I turn bright red, start having heart palpitations and sometimes get hives. Currently taking buspar and ativan as needed. buspar helps with the anxiety but nothing seems to help me iwth my terror of anyone in the whitecoat, even SCRUBS. Can anyone relate? I feel like a maniac! or offer any advice on desensitization techniques, cognitive therapy or anything? I am scheduled to go back to a Pdoc in August to go back on antidepressants for the panic and anxiety before it ruins me again. Strangely enough I am not afraid of neurologists or psychiatrists....Any thoughts? Thanks for reading :) 

janetlee
Veteran Member


Date Joined Mar 2006
Total Posts : 1986
   Posted 7/5/2007 8:26 PM (GMT -6)   
Hi Horses!
I can relate to some extent! I was in remission from GAD for many years but it came back on me with a vengeance in January of 2006. I hadn't been that bad in about 9-10 years!
I'd been on zoloft (200mg) for about that whole time and after some investigation on my own (hey, sometimes you have to be your own advocate!) I figured it could be that the zoloft had "pooped out". I'd never knew that a drug could eventually stop working. Anyhow, I am now on 75mg of Paxil and it has been a great help. I don't even take xanax any more, but can if I need it! I tend to relate my feelings of anxiety to whatever I'm doing at the time...for example, when I was anxious, I'd think of doing something and the idea would make me freak out. I realized that when I felt better, I wouldn't feel that way about it and sure enough I didn't.
In your case, your fear came on you at a doctor's office and you relate it to the anxiety, but chances are that you would've felt the same way if you'd been in traffic or at your house or whatever! When my relapse hit me, it was in the morning when I first woke up! I had nothing consciously on my mind! I do believe that a lot of it is imbalances of chemicals in our brains. When the anxiety hits us, our own fearful negative thoughts then aggravate our feelings about what's going on with us. It's a vicious circle!
Please do be open to trying another AD. Some have been helped greatly by Lexapro, Paxil, Effexor or other ADs. If my Paxil ever stops working, I'll be looking for another AD right away!
Take care and also I highly recommend the books by Dr. Claire Weeks. You can find them cheap on ebay. I read a lot of self-help stuff but hers was the only ones I could seem to relate to. Others may feel differently. I also take Taurine, an amino acid that is SAFE (do research and see for yourself). It has been the only thing of an alternative nature that's helped me.
Take care!
janet
Yesterday's dead
Tomorrow's unknown
Today is here
And soon will be gone.
Use it wisely
Before it's too late
Remember to love
And forget to hate.
janet


HorsesHealme
Regular Member


Date Joined Jul 2007
Total Posts : 22
   Posted 7/6/2007 6:53 AM (GMT -6)   
wow! Thank you so much for your reply :) I think you really are on to something there with the negative feeling association. I never thought of that, I have always thought it was some suppressed doctor fear I didn't know about before it decided to show its ugly head last year. Unfortunately over the past year I have a developed an actual fear of white coats, scrubs and blood pressure machines  because of the negative feeling I had that one day, my blood pressure goes up to like 156/91 at the doctor... anyways that would make alot of sense since the fear itself it was not provoked by anything a doctor or dentist. ever did to me. Thank you for that thought. I am definitly going to ask for an AD again, you are right. I might try zoloft again as I ahve been off of it for several years and I don't think it ever stopped working. Unfortunately I have to pay out of pocket for my psych visit so I want to make sure I get on the right thing pretty quick he is expeeeeeeensive, half hour is like $100. It is worth it to me considering how sick I was with this when I was younger, I don't want it to progress much further.  I will do some research on the taurine as well. Have you heard of L-lysine or L-glutamine helping?
Thanks again!
 

Howlyncat
Elite Member


Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 7/6/2007 7:25 AM (GMT -6)   
Welcome to HW and to our lil family

As always our Janet has given you great advice and input

I diont have these fears you speak of so I cannot help you out I am sorry

I am sure that the others and there are a couple that do have this phobia will post and give you some more input

Please do stay with us and get the support you so rightly deserve

Take care

LYN
    Contribute today to support Healing Well Forums...Donate @
 
Moderator for Anxiety /Panic
Moderator for Alzheimer's
Co Moderator for Crohns Disease 
 
 DX with Crohns, Pyoderma Gangrenosum,Anxiety /Panic
 
 Your Mind is like a Parachute...Works better when IT IS Open
 
 Be Thankful for the Difficult times..During those times we GROW
 
             EMPATHY is Always Better than APATHY
 
 Walk With Us We Will Take your Hand .......
 
  
                                  


stkitt
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 7/6/2007 9:05 AM (GMT -6)   

Hi and welcome. I wish you a good stay here. I am Kitt.

Please look around and post as you feel comfortable. Feel free to ask any questions you may have about the site.

 I think you recieved great advice from Janet too. I agree that going back on the med makes very good sense. Do you have to wait until August? It would be nice if you could start now. yeah

Keep posting and you will find you have just become a member of a wonderful family.

 


Respectfully
Kitt
 
Moderator Anxiety ~ Panic Disorders
*~* Not a mental health professional at all *~*

Dx: Anxiety/Panic, Depression 
______________________________________________________
"If you doubt you can accomplish something, then you can’t accomplish it. You have to have confidence in your ability, and then be tough enough to follow through.” 
~Rosalyn Carter


janetlee
Veteran Member


Date Joined Mar 2006
Total Posts : 1986
   Posted 7/6/2007 11:22 AM (GMT -6)   
Horses,
There are programs thru the drugs companies that can provide your meds for free if you qualify. I don't have time now to talk, but will try to get back to you tonite!
janet
Yesterday's dead
Tomorrow's unknown
Today is here
And soon will be gone.
Use it wisely
Before it's too late
Remember to love
And forget to hate.
janet


HorsesHealme
Regular Member


Date Joined Jul 2007
Total Posts : 22
   Posted 7/6/2007 4:41 PM (GMT -6)   
Hey, thanks again everyone :) I have to wait until August because I have a doctor appointment at that time (and a week off of work for vacation to adjust to new meds) I am currently on Buspar though that helps me with some anxiety symptoms (twitches and easy startling) I am on a low 30 mg dose though. And if for some reason I get a wiff of an on coming panic attack (which I usually do not but they only come from triggers) or a real bad day where I feel the "static" I take ativan. So I am maintained until August BUT will be even better once I start something that can smooth off and ward away my panic. Looking back I do not think I had a single panic attack or had this issue of turning red all the time while on antidepressants in the past so I look forward to that possibility again. My prescriptions luckily are covered on my insurance, for what ever reason anything considered behavioral health is not so the psychiatrist appt is out of my pocket. I intend to switch insurance companies for next year though because they do not cover alot of the other things that really help me, like massage! I thank you all again and although I am sorry you also suffer from this it does feel comforting to know others with similar issues exist. I have everyone who knows me baffled since they can't understand what is going on considering my low stress life. People I know are either well balanced or suffer from depression so I tend to slightly aggravate them with my hypervigilance and intense nature. Have a wonderful day!

Howlyncat
Elite Member


Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 7/7/2007 7:55 AM (GMT -6)   
Hoping you keep us posted and DO stay with us ...........

This is the best site for caring ,support empathy and understanding .....never judgement .......

Be well

LYN
    Contribute today to support Healing Well Forums...Donate @
 
Moderator for Anxiety /Panic
Moderator for Alzheimer's
Co Moderator for Crohns Disease 
 
 DX with Crohns, Pyoderma Gangrenosum,Anxiety /Panic
 
 Your Mind is like a Parachute...Works better when IT IS Open
 
 Be Thankful for the Difficult times..During those times we GROW
 
             EMPATHY is Always Better than APATHY
 
 Walk With Us We Will Take your Hand .......
 
  
                                  


stkitt
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 7/7/2007 8:05 AM (GMT -6)   

Hey Horses,

I like your positive attitude and your right, people that don't suffer from A & P tend to drift away when you try to talk about how you feel.

Please stay with us and post whenever your comfortable.

 


Respectfully
Kitt
 
Moderator Anxiety ~ Panic Disorders
*~* Not a mental health professional at all *~*

Dx: Anxiety/Panic, Depression 
______________________________________________________
"If you doubt you can accomplish something, then you can’t accomplish it. You have to have confidence in your ability, and then be tough enough to follow through.” 
~Rosalyn Carter

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