Just as a little background - i am 19, male, and after having EVERY stomach test done to see what was making me sick, recently got diagnosed with an anxiety disorder, although they haven't named the disorder as yet.
My dad got taken into hospital a few weeks back, and although i was terrified for him, it MADE me get up and do things everyday which took away a lot of my worrying and depression because i was having to do things for myself and my brothers whilst my parents were away. I had far less bad days and thought to myself "hey maybe i will be well enough to go to uni this year after all". Despite feeling better then i had in 11 months, i still didn't dare go as far as the hospital to see my dad and he was great and understood competely, but it didn't make me wish i was with him any less.
I sadly lost my dad earlier this week but thankfully plucked up the currage to go in and be with him as he passed away. Today i had a bad tummy again, feeling very sick, even though its about 5 days since he passed away. The second i get the nausea i'm thinking "I will be ill forever and never get well. It can't be anxiety, it must be something chronic that they won't be able to cure and i will never have a "real" life or job or anything".
Does anyone else feel like this? The second things go wrong, your thinking all doomy and gloomy? I know they say "take one day at a time" but it feels like everyone i know is moving fast and having a great time, and i'm just having the longest, sadest year of my life.