I feel so alone...i just need someone to understand

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chellybelly
Regular Member


Date Joined May 2006
Total Posts : 21
   Posted 11/13/2007 6:23 PM (GMT -7)   
as long as i can remember i've had anxiety...i get so stressed out about things. i have 2 papers and a test next monday and another test next friday (in university for nursing...soooo stressful)... i've been freaking out almost all day. i'm grouchy and i'm irritiable...mostly b/c i just wish someone would understand. i wish so bad right now someone would just hug me and tell me i'm strong and i can do it... it'll be hard work but i can do it... it's not enough when it's just me saying that and i phone my beloved mother for support and she gets irritated that i'm so stressed out and irritable. she's telling me 3 things i need to do but i have so many other things to do... she doesnt understand why i'm so stressed. i almost cried after i got off the phone with her...instead of telling me i need to get used to it or ignorning me completely or brushing me off with an unconcerned, uninterested sigh or "huh" i just wish she would say something helpful... i wish someone would.
i live with my brother and he, too is just like my mom... says the same things. "it's just going to get worse" "you think you have stress now. i wish i had your stress"... i feel so alone in this. everyone in my clinical group is fine, happy, not stressing at all...what the heck. i dont get it...how do you stay calm and collected knowing all that is due? plus i need to work to pay rent and buy food... i'm so frustrated.

Casem
Regular Member


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 187
   Posted 11/13/2007 6:56 PM (GMT -7)   
chelly...
everything is going to be ok...because you are a strong, capable person with wonderful talents and a strong will and spirit. Just breathe....and breathe some more.....and take a long walk, or a nice long hot bath, or watch a romantic comedy. I know exactly how you feel. You wish the people closest to you could just get in your head and undertsand exactly how you are feeling and say and do the exact thing you need the most to make you feel better.....but they can't...and they never will be able to.

And when they don't....it makes it hurt more....so we need to stop expecting that from them....all it does is get us more upset. Trust me, I have been there. I drove to the next state over last Friday because I Was so upset that no one in my family seemed to understand me and just was not giving me the love and support I needed. It turns out....it had to come from within me.....

I have to make sure I am on the right meds....and talking to my therapist regularly...and talking to my HW family here on line...and doing all of the things I know that help to me feel not so alone. Remember, your family loves you very much, they just DO NOT understand our anxiety or how we feel or what we need to hear. That is our issue, not theirs.

You are not alone....we are all here together.....vent all you need to....we are listening...and we understand.......Stay STrong!
 
Casem
 


TeNNiSd0C09
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jul 2007
Total Posts : 1303
   Posted 11/13/2007 7:02 PM (GMT -7)   

I can understand. If you can believe that. I don't have to work and buy food or nothing, but I go to school. We are out on break next week so all of my teachers want to squeeze in major tests before the holiday. It's only high school, and I may only be in 11th grade, but having anxiety makes it so much worse. Plus, my classes include Anatomy and Physio, History(teacher is essay test crazy), Pre-Calculus, Honors English, Child Development, Latin II, and Chemistry. So, I know about the stress. My Latin II class is an AP Distance Learning class. I take it in a special lab and it is an online class. My teacher for it teaches at a different school, so imagine trying to teach yourself a different language like that! We have a deadline to have all of our work done. I will never make it. I am really stressed out by school so I understand what you are going through. I have tests more this year than ever before. Its horrible.

The anxiety. The stress. The no sleeping. Not being able to concentrate enough to study or do my work. The constant pressure I put on myself to do the best. Its hard. I cant imagine what it must be like for you at a university. I will know soon though. I only have a year and a half left. And unless a miracle happens and I get better, it will be horrible. Plus, I plan on being a doctor of some sort, always wanted to be a surgeon, but I am questioning that now. Thinking of being a Psychiatrist. I enjoy psychology and have alot in common with it so I think it would be good. But, I have wanted to be a surgeon since I was born. Not sure if I can give that dream up. But, maybe I am following a different dream, I don't know. But, it will be hard.

Anyways, sorry to vent so much about myself. I was trying to help you. But, anyways, you are not alone, and I understand exactly what you mean. My mom is the same way. Always has been. It is very irritating and I often feel the same as you do about it.

Well, sorry this is so long and I am taking up your time. Take care! And good luck on your tests and papers! 


liquid
Regular Member


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 127
   Posted 11/13/2007 7:30 PM (GMT -7)   

Hi Chelly,

I understand how you feel, and i just want to let you know if you need someone to listen drop me line by email or on here, i know it is really hard for you right now but you are a strong person, and remember that everyone here at HW is here to help in any way we can.. :-)

Take care of your self.. :-)


Suffer from major depression, Agoraphobia, Anxiety, Panic attacks, Recovering Alcoholic.
 
I have 4 great kids and a wonderfully supportive partner.
 
"There is a light at the end of the tunnel"
 
 


chellybelly
Regular Member


Date Joined May 2006
Total Posts : 21
   Posted 11/13/2007 7:33 PM (GMT -7)   
the thing is...we all have stress. to you high school is probably just as stressful on you as university is on me. at this particular time in life it is hard...just like i once struggled to get through grade 7 math. that was very hard and stressful for me then...of course i look back and say "i wish" because if i were to go back at this exact moment of course it would be easy...but it doesnt work that way. the stress matches your level of maturity and stage in life...i dont believe that it keeps getting harder, it's jsut that the previous stuff seems easier than the present stuff. that's why i get so upset when people say things like that to me...and besides, what will syaing that help anyway? telling me to get over it isn't going to make a light bulb turn on and i'll be like "wow...you're right. i need to just forget about it because this isn't stress...stress is only when you have 12 kids and a thousand bills and no job to pay for it all..." not going to happen. it just makes us hurt, feel alone, isolated and more depressed that we can't just handle it like other people 

TeNNiSd0C09
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jul 2007
Total Posts : 1303
   Posted 11/13/2007 7:39 PM (GMT -7)   
I totally agree with what you stated. And stress is different on everyone. What stresses me may not stress you as much. Everyone is different and process things differently. Its a matter of accepting that that others don't understand. I have done a lot of Psychology research and common sense thinking and I have realized people are not accepting. They don't accept that everyone is different. That really bothers me, but I guess that's life. I could look at it like some others are not as fortunate as to think about stuff from my point of view. I tend to see things differently than most people. I am very accepting because I realize no one is the same and things are different for everyone. People need to be more understanding....and accepting.... 

stkitt
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 11/13/2007 8:39 PM (GMT -7)   

Dear chelly,

Hey there kiddo, hi, this is Kitt........

There is a book named How to Survive and Maybe Even Love Nursing School;  Author: Dunham, Kelli S.  You may find this a fun read.

I went to Nurse's training at the age of 34 with 4 children at home and I made it.  I put up my Christmas tree in July and bought lots of frozen pizza's.  My chldren helped me study and I made it throught LPN school, however I had to go on as I wanted to be an ICU nurse so back to school I went.  Never took that tree down.  lol. I was stressed to the max and actually had a minor mini melt down. My husband had major surgery that year and I got my only B + so ended with a 3.89 GPA.  I was of course going for the 4.0

So I know you can do this.  I believed in me and I knew I was smart enough but  strength is what I really needed to pull from deep within.  I shed tears and ranted and prayed and studied hard.

Many of my classmates went through the same anxiety as I did only for different reasons.  One student became pregnant, another's husband had died right before school started.  You see sweeetie, you are truly not alone and I would bet every nursing student in your class has stress, they may not admit to it but they do.

What helped me most was my sense of humor and of course my wonderful hubby.  I could cry and in the end laugh at myself for being so hard on me.  I did not have to be perfect.

Please know you are doing a wonderful job and that you will make it through your school. You will go on to be a wonderful nurse.  Many hugs to you and lots of Support from you family here at Healing Well.

Believing in yourself comes from knowing what you are really capable of doing. When it's your turn to step up to the plate, realize that you won't hit a home run every time but your still in the game.  You  go girl. Hugs to you.

Kitt


 


 
Moderator Anxiety ~ Panic Disorders
*~* Not a mental health professional at all *~*
Dx: Anxiety/Panic, Depression, GERD, Osteoarthritis
*Wife of a Crohnie*
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It is health that is real wealth and not pieces of gold and silver.~Mahatma Gandhi~
 


liquid
Regular Member


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 127
   Posted 11/14/2007 6:46 PM (GMT -7)   

Wow,

That was so inspiring in so many different ways Kitt. You can read that in different ways and stll get the same inspiring message.

Your right we are who we are, and everyone is different and handles things differently, and believing in what you know you can do, even if you don't get the home run, you are still in the game.

Thanks for the inspiriation..

Hope that helped you as much as it did me Chelly, I also know you can do it, and you have all of my support.

Take care, (((((HUGS))))).. :-)


Suffer from major depression, Agoraphobia, Anxiety, Panic attacks, Recovering Alcoholic.
 
I have 4 great kids and a wonderfully supportive partner.
 
"There is a light at the end of the tunnel"
 
 

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