Post Edited (mynameis) : 11/29/2007 11:16:27 AM (GMT-7)
Hello, this is Kitt. I have just read your posts as I have been out of town recently.
I agree with Tammy after reading your posts in depth. I suspect from the flavor of your last post you have already figured things out and feel that something is wrong with your relationship with this man.
One piece of advice I wanted to share with you if I may? In your first post your wrote:
"there's nothing about her which makes her any more worthy of him than me"
IMHO, You are a young woman who has not learned to love yourself. You are worthy of love and goodness in a relationship and never feel like you have to be worthy of someone loving you. Hold your head up high and know that you are a special person. Wait for the right man. You will know him when you meet him. He won't be talking online to 17 year olds instead of you. From the words of KT Tunstall just tell him "I said no, no, you're not the one for me."
Gentle Hugs to you
Thank you Tammy and Kit for sharing your opinions. It's comforting that you seem to understand why I'm concerned about it. I just don't understand why a 24 year old would want to talk to a 17 year old. He's not exactly immature or anything so I don't see how this girl could have got on to his friendslist in the first place. To be fair he was friendly with her before he even met me, so I don't feel I can really dictate who he talks to just because I have paranoid fears.
Stkitt, ever since we met in August and got together officially I haven't felt good enough for him. He's really good looking and has a wonderful personality and I don't exactly know what he sees in me. I don't want to lose him but I'm just finding all this distance apart and hardly ever seeing him is really making my anxiety worse. I can't work out whether my increased anxiety is something I would have in any relationship or whether it's just something that's particular to this one. I don't know what to do really, apart from put up with it and hope things improve.
I am so sorry you feel insecure as you have so much to offer and never think your not good enough. Being handsome and having a good personality is what you see but others may see him different.
I will go out on a limb here and please know this is my personal opinion from raising a teenage girl and having teenage granddaughters. I do not see what a man in his 20's would have in common with someone in highschool ? Perhaps it strokes his ego to talk online to a 17 year old or perhaps he really is not who you think he is.
This is really about you and how you feel about yourself. You should be on top of the world with a great boyfriend and not feeling anxious and wondering what he sees in you? Have you considered counseling for you. CBT therapy is a great way to learn to turn those negative feelings into positive feelings. :)
Please keep talking to us as we are here for you. We do not judge but just try to look at the big picture and our words are just advice but we will support whatever you decide to do.
Post Edited (Howlyncat) : 12/2/2007 12:44:07 PM (GMT-7)