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stkitt
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   Posted 11/1/2009 10:26 AM (GMT -7)    Quote This Post
Dear Friends,
 
Here it is November 1st already and my it was a busy October.
 
I am doing well and trying to pace myself with the holiday season soon upon us.
 
I have been working fulltime and letting the other stuff go as I have learned that worrying and overextending myself equals increased anxeity.
 
I did have a few rough days as this time of year my hubby is gone nearly every week-end so I spend a lot of time alone.  I have come here to this great site and talked with many of you and I have found Farmville on FB so I have a new distraction to keep me busy.
 
As far as my personal goal, I am working on learning to forgive. 
 
For me forgiving isn't the same as forgetting what happened . The act the hurt or offense  may always remain a part of my  life. But forgiveness can lessen its grip on me  and help me focus on other, positive parts of my  life.
 
To me forgiveness also means that I  change old patterns of beliefs and actions.  Thank you to a friend who recently shared with me that it feels better to forgive then to hold a grudge. 
 
I am a work in progress.
 
Now I would love to hear how your doing.
 
Gentle Hugs,
 
Kitt
 


 

~~ Kitt ~~
Moderator: Osteoarthritis, GERD/Heartburn, &
Anxiety/Panic
*~* http://www.healingwell.com/donate *~*
"When you find peace within yourself, you become the kind of person who can live at peace with others."
"I am not a mental health professional, nor do I play one on TV, I just kind of talk like one!"


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melodee
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   Posted 11/1/2009 12:48 PM (GMT -7)    Quote This Post
Hi...
 
Well I decided not to talk about what I couldn't do or what I should have done...and things I wanted to change...that's the past.
 
Instead, I will talk about the future. Tomorrow is my birthday. ;) And since it's also a new month now, I think it's great to make new changes.  I have to work on a lot of things and I will! Only I can MAKE THAT CHANGE!
 
Melodee :-)
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debaser
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   Posted 11/1/2009 12:48 PM (GMT -7)    Quote This Post
Well, I'm doing pretty good. Anxiety really isn't much of a problem for me at the moment. Business turned around and I posted I think 7 really strong weeks in a row. Time may be running out for that as some law and regulatory changes here in Texas will change the way I do business quite a bit, but eventually it will get back to normal. Either way, the strong weeks I had recently should help me weather a short dry spell.

I've actually been looking into buying a house or condo. I've never bought property before so this it's sort of stressful for me, but it's not the same thing as anxiety.

And I've been looking at getting myself insured again, which has me angry but that's not the same thing as anxiety, either.

So I've been trying to take advantage of my "smooth spell" by using it to take care of business-business and personal business, too. Have also been better about keeping in touch with friends and that sort of thing. I'm still not as social as I'd like, but I try not to beat myself up about that because I'm a pretty busy guy and I get tired.

All in all I feel that things are going pretty well for me.

Anyway, Kitt, I know what you mean. It can be hard to forgive but carrying around the weight of a grudge is a lot harder in my opinion. I recently had to re-learn the same lesson. It definitely feels good to let go of that kind of stuff. To me, having a grudge feels a lot like guilt. It's just negative baggage and weight that we don't really need to carry around with us. I think it's far better and easier to move forward.


www.613photo.com/

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Junebug05
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   Posted 11/1/2009 8:59 PM (GMT -7)    Quote This Post
I'm doing well anxiety wise, a little tiny bit anxious in the mornings sometimes, but nothing I can't handle and it doesn't last long.  I'm still really missing Buster, it's much harder without him here than I ever imagined, and spending the majority of my time alone really doesn't help.  My husband is on second shift, and is gone about 12 hours a day, and my daughter works 6 days a week, various hours, but usually late afternoon to late at night as well, so I'm home alone with my thoughts and lonliness way too much!  So, I'm trying to just get through this.  I know it seems crazy that I'm having such a difficult time with the loss of a dog, but he was my world, truly my best friend and I really do feel lost without him here.  In time I hope this will get easier.  This weekend, I'll be spending my first night completely alone in over 12 years and am really dreading it.  My husband will be hunting and my daughter has plans, so I'll be here just me.  It never used to bother me when Buster was here, but now I guess we'll just have to see how it goes...cross your fingers everyone!
 
I've gotten back to studying for the national medical coding exam.  I took the class last Jan-May, and was supposed to take the test on June 19th, but then my sweet Buster died and I just couldn't handle it.  So I'm starting over with the reading and studying and preparing to take it, hopefully, in Jan. or Feb.  It's so much to learn, and very complicated, but honestly it's just what I need to keep busy and try to move forward. 
 
Yesterday, I took a huge step, I drove the car alone.  I was following my husband, taking our camper back over to the storage area where we keep it for the winter.  I haven't driven alone  in years and...I loved every minute of it!  My daughter is adding me to her cell phone plan, so I'll have a phone to take with me when I get out and drive...when there's a car available...we only have two cars and I told you my families schedules, so it isn't always easy.  I think having a cell phone will make me feel more comfortable, just in case I need a little pep talk or get anxious and want to talk to someone.  I was just so shocked that driving over there was so easy...hopefully it wasn't just beginners luck, but I'll just handle whatever comes. 
 
Glad to see that those who have posted are doing well, and I hope more will post updates as well.  Happy Birthday Melodee...you share a birthday with my husband, his is tomorrow too.  Hope you have a great day!
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Twiggygal
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   Posted 11/2/2009 12:52 AM (GMT -7)    Quote This Post
Well, me and my fiance picked a wedding date of may 22, 2010.  In like 6 months! LOL  I've been trying to pick out wedding songs right now, and thinking about who to invite!
 
So hard to do! I'm excited because I love him so much!
 
Hope all is well with everyone!
 
~TG


"Be glad of life because it gives you the chance to love and to work and to play and to look up at the stars."

DX: Panic Disorder, Depression, TMJ (Temporomandibular Joint Disorder), Chronic Migraines
 
RX: Lorazepam (1 MG - 2 mgs a day), Lexapro (20 MG a day), Tylonel for the TMJ and Migraines
 
 
IT'S A GIRL! Amelia Candice.
 
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stkitt
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   Posted 11/2/2009 6:40 AM (GMT -7)    Quote This Post

I love reading all the updates and hope more join in and share how things are going for them cool

Next up ..........  :-)     turn    :-)

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Green Grove
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   Posted 11/2/2009 1:33 PM (GMT -7)    Quote This Post
I have been doing alright with my anxiety lately. . . I have had to move up on my benzo a little and will be seeing my doctor the 16th of this month to work on the adjustment. I am finding myself in one of the hardest tests of my anxiety in my life after G'ma had her stroke over a month ago. . . There is so much "what if" thinking when you love somebody so much. The one thing that has kept me going is the fact that I don't have any other choice, because someone's life/well being is in my hands. Have to stay with it :)

I have also been spending time on FB playing FarmVille and other games. . . It has also been a wonderful resource for me to keep in touch with so many friends and family, some I have not seen in years :) I am also learning to just take everything one day at a time and quit worrying about the future so much, because there is nothing I can do about it anyway. . . What will happen will happen regardless of how much I unnecessarily stress on it. I'm also slowly working myself back through my CBT as time allows, and though I don't meditate as much as I did, I still find time to kick back and read a little everyday. If I'm lucky I get a nap in as well :) I cut out caffeine totally at this time and am proud to say that I am only smoking a couple of cigarettes a day. . . Maybe by the first of the year I can be rid of another bad habit :)

I sure have enjoyed reading everyone's updates and pray that everyone's lives become balanced so you all can enjoy it to the fullest :) Take care now and may peace be with you all!


***Sam***
Anxiety-Panic Disorders Forum Co-Moderator

"Life be not so short but that there is always time for courtesy."
~
Ralph Waldo Emerson~
 
. . .Not a professional. . .
Please consult your doctor before making changes to meds or lifestyle.

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Sunshine29
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   Posted 11/2/2009 4:18 PM (GMT -7)    Quote This Post
Well...Im not sleeping and it's driving me bonkers! It is affecting me physically...nausea...lighheaded....anxious that I'll never sleep again. I really think that its the Zoloft thats doing this to me. I just want to cry. I tried Ambien last night...4 hours of sleep isnt cutting it.
Sunshine
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Green Grove
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   Posted 11/5/2009 9:01 AM (GMT -7)    Quote This Post
Bump


***Sam***
Anxiety-Panic Disorders Forum Co-Moderator

"Life be not so short but that there is always time for courtesy."
~
Ralph Waldo Emerson~
 
. . .Not a professional. . .
Please consult your doctor before making changes to meds or lifestyle.

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stkitt
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   Posted 11/5/2009 6:09 PM (GMT -7)    Quote This Post

Quick update,  I am so happy to read how all of you are doing...............I have joined Sam and many others in Farmville and it does take my mind off myself.  devil

Also my daughter and son-in-law are taking me to Las Vegas in December to celebrate my birthday and we have tickets to the Cher concert so I am thrilled about that.

A wedding, Twiggy..............how exciting.  Do keep sharing the event details with us.

Love and Hugs

Kitt

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Mazfire
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   Posted 11/6/2009 2:01 PM (GMT -7)    Quote This Post

im busy busy busy with work, im stressed cos im sick and im also addicted to farmville!!

Maz XX


 Co-Moderator Anxiety & Panic- Depression
 
" Why does society view illness as weakness?" (Montell Jordan)
 'He heals the broken hearted and binds up their wounds.' (Psalm 147:3)
-DX:Panic Disorder, Agoraphobia, CFS, Seasonal Depression, Fibromyalgia, Chronic Sinusitis, TMJ, Endometriosis,PCOS, Reactive Arthritis, Anemia, Chemical/Noise/Light sensitivity, Trichotilomania,
OCD, GERD, IBS.
-Meds: Zoloft 150mg. Xanax 4mg. Prescription pain meds/anti inflammatories.
-Multiple surgeries- I bear the scars of my poor physical health.
-Age:29. AP first DX @ 10. Fibro etc DX @14.
 
 

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stkitt
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   Posted 11/6/2009 6:23 PM (GMT -7)    Quote This Post

Maz,

I am looking for a neighbor for farmville, will you be my friend?

Hugs,

Kitt

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Mazfire
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   Posted 11/6/2009 8:57 PM (GMT -7)    Quote This Post

Of course!!

Maz XX


 Co-Moderator Anxiety & Panic- Depression
 
" Why does society view illness as weakness?" (Montell Jordan)
 'He heals the broken hearted and binds up their wounds.' (Psalm 147:3)
-DX:Panic Disorder, Agoraphobia, CFS, Seasonal Depression, Fibromyalgia, Chronic Sinusitis, TMJ, Endometriosis,PCOS, Reactive Arthritis, Anemia, Chemical/Noise/Light sensitivity, Trichotilomania,
OCD, GERD, IBS.
-Meds: Zoloft 150mg. Xanax 4mg. Prescription pain meds/anti inflammatories.
-Multiple surgeries- I bear the scars of my poor physical health.
-Age:29. AP first DX @ 10. Fibro etc DX @14.
 
 

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Treester
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   Posted 11/7/2009 9:30 AM (GMT -7)    Quote This Post
I am doing OK, too.
 
There are some things in my life that have me feeling stressed and overwhelmed, but like someone else said, it's a little different than the anxiety I was dealing with before.  I've been working really hard to stay in the moment and deal with things in the present, rather than letting myself get caught up in the "what if" spiral.  That extrapolation does nothing but cause me to shut down, and then I can't get anywhere.
 
The holidays are tough for me, because I have a lot of social anxiety (yes, even with my own family).  I'm hopeful that this holiday season will be a little different than years past, though, because of the overall improvements in my life.
 
Thanks for asking!
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Jennara
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   Posted 11/7/2009 10:33 AM (GMT -7)    Quote This Post
I'm doing horribly!  I am at the start of a custody battle with my ex.  He's an alcoholic.  Sometimes he sobers up for a while which is good.  But he doesnt think he has a problem.  He gets drunk and wakes up so nervous the next day and wanting to drink more.   But he just doesnt think he has a problem.  He does though because back when we were together Social Services told both of us we had to undergo an intensive treatment program 3 hours a day, 3 days a week for alcohol abuse.  We completed it and I havent drank in 2 years.  The last time I did I woke up so terrified the next day that I ended up in the hospital.  That was a lesson learned.  I'm lucky I dont crave alcohol at all.  Very lucky!  And I know that I have a problem.  If I did drink, I wouldnt be able to stop.  But the next day is what keeps me strait.  That and my daughter. 
Anyway, my ex tells me that since I have no proof to take in to court that he still drinks, its hearsay.  Like my word against his.  I can tell them about his friends calling me worried about his drinking but they wont testify.  I can tell them he calls me drunk every once in a while.  All he has to do is say I'm lieing. 
Another thing, we split up over a year ago.  I have a great amount of separation anxiety and I found someone else pretty fast.  I didnt introduce my daughter to him until the 4th month we were dating.  It felt like it was getting serious and he's a real good guy.  Then at 6 months I moved in with him.  My daughter was living with me here half the time and her dad the other half.  But when I found out my ex had taken up drinking again and refuses treatment, I decided to keep my daughter with me until we can go to court and get it worked out there.
I'm doing so horrible bc my lawyer told me me living with my boyfriend is going to look bad.  Well I've been with him about a year now and my daughter likes him and we want to get married.  We just want to wait a couple years.  But thats how serious we are.  He's a great man!
Also, I started out doing so good when I split up with my ex.  I was looking for a job, got signed up for help with going back to school, applied for wellfare, got it, and was ready to start life indepent.  But my anxiety has already cost me a great paying job and a class!  Now I have nothing again!  They are going to shut off my wellfare check bc I lost the job and the class.  I'm back to having panic attacks everyday.  I'm really struggling with this!  I have never been able to keep a job bc of this anxiety.  I go to therapy, take my meds, they say theres nothing more they can do for me.  Everything in therapy is repetative.  My therapist is sending me to someone else now.  I dont know what to do?!?!?!  I cant loose my daughter!  I'm capable of taking care of her and I have help from my boyfriend and his mother and sister and father.  I have friends that help also.  I just get so agorophobic!  I dont know what to do!  I'm fine going out shopping with loved ones.  Most of the time.  But being away from them all day is whats so hard.  I cant concentrate and I get panicy! 
I'm afraid of loosing my daughter!  I'm afraid of not being able to provide!  I'm doing horrible!
 
-Jen
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Nanners
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   Posted 11/7/2009 10:54 AM (GMT -7)    Quote This Post
Don't worry Jennara about losing your daughter. Your ex would have to prove that you are a abusive mother, and it doesn't sound like you are. Take a deep breath, and have faith. I think all will be okay. They can test your husband for alchohol abuse, so don't believe his lies. Good luck!

As for me, I am doing great. I really seem to have gotten control of my anxiety, and it doesn't seem to have control of me anymore. I recognize for what it is now, and am able to stop it in its tracks.

Hugs,
Gail*Nanners*


Gail*Nanners* Co-Moderator for Crohns Disease and Anxiety/Panic Forum
Crohn's Disease for over 33 years. Currently on Asacol, Prilosec, Estrace, Prinivil, Diltiazem, Percoset prn for pain, Zofran, Phenergan, Probiotics, Calcium  w/Vit D, and Xanax as needed. Resections in 2002 and 2005. Also diagnosed with Fibromyalgia, Osteoarthritis, and Anxiety. Currently my Crohns is in remission, but my joints are going crazy!
It's scary when you start making the same noises As your coffee maker.
*Every tomorrow has two handles.  We can take hold of it by the handle of anxiety, or by the handle of faith"*
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dixibella
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   Posted 11/10/2009 8:14 PM (GMT -7)    Quote This Post
Hey all its been a while. My anxiety has been doing pretty well despite some setbacks. Another of my husbands sibs was hospitalized for the flu, she is still having respiratory distress of unknown origin, his brother who had the accident is doing better and we'll know next week whether he needs surgery. My brother and his wife have had run ins with the law and my parents have custody of my 2 nephews, the 4 month old will be having heart surgery this week to repair a hole, he's a tiny little guy, just 10lbs and I'm just totally unable to even allow myself to get emotional about it. My nerves are raw from a hectic time at work and people being jerks, but besides just being edgy and a little oversensitive I think I'm doing ok. Hopefully 6 mos from now it won't rear up and bite me like before but I'm just trying to keep up with the things that relax me, been doing a lot of riding, reading books... and I'm glad I'm not the only farmville addict!!! :) I love that silly game! But anyways... I'm keeping my anxiety at bay. Its been helping that I got some GOOD PT from a physical therapist who isn't a looloo hippie who thinks my liver has been exposed to too much mold and discovered that I have likely got thoracic outlet syndrome, I told her what bothers me and she gave me 3 really simple exercises and its totally helped! Who knew a couple of overtight neck muscles could cause so much pain?? Its even reduced about 80% of the chest pain I was experiencing! I'm NOT crazy! Yay! And I don't need medications or injections! Hrmph! I'd like to kick my D.O. but at least I finally pushed and got the help I needed. So its progress and I'm really happy. Lessening my pain has really helped me to get better control over my anxiety. So that's what's new here. Just taking it one day at a time. Got some good stuff to look forward to this month... big horse event, New Moon, and Thanksgiving... my favorite! So i'm determined its going to be a good month! Hope you are all doing well!
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stkitt
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   Posted 11/17/2009 11:21 AM (GMT -7)    Quote This Post
Hello All and thank you for checking in.........it is so great to hear from each of you and to know you are well even if you are still struggling you are working on your anxiety.
 
I am doing much better then I was back in August and I think getting back to work and not fearing the "what ifs"  has helped me a lot.
 
We still have members that have not posted so here is where you let us hear from you and know we really care about you.
 
Gnetl Hugs
Kitt


 

~~ Kitt ~~
Moderator: Osteoarthritis,  Gerd/Heartburn, &
Anxiety/Panic

*~* http://www.healingwell.com/donate *~*

"Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another: "What! You, too? Thought I was the only one." C.S. Lewis 
"I am not a mental health professional, nor do I play one on TV, I just kind of talk like one!"


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Precious Gem
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   Posted 11/19/2009 12:11 PM (GMT -7)    Quote This Post

Anxiety off the scale since being diagnosed with BP1 as well.  Not stable yet..........The only thing that keeps me going, I have PDoc appt tomorrow and Thanksgiving is next week and it is my favorite holiday ever!  Just getting through the days, trying to stay upbeat........Hope everyone has a happy Thanksgiving. wink

Gem

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stkitt
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   Posted Yesterday 8:20 AM (GMT -7)    Quote This Post

Gem, Be kind to yourself and do not expect so much all at once. You will get through this with help  from the Doctors and support from all here. 

I  cannot believe I started this thread on 11/1 and next week is already Thanksgiving.  I will say a prayer for you that you have a wonderful Thanksgiving and please know you are care for deeply by all here.

Gentle Hugs

Kitt


 

~~ Kitt ~~
Moderator: Osteoarthritis,  Gerd/Heartburn, &
Anxiety/Panic

*~* http://www.healingwell.com/donate *~*

"Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another: "What! You, too? Thought I was the only one." C.S. Lewis 
"I am not a mental health professional, nor do I play one on TV, I just kind of talk like one!"


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Precious Gem
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   Posted Yesterday 8:26 AM (GMT -7)    Quote This Post

Thanks Kitt and you are right, all good things take time.  I am so impatient to feel well, everyday!  Looking forward to cooking that Turkey.  My husband I have such a great time cooking, everyone pitches in and anyone we know are always welcome.  thanks for the support, I am feeling a bit better today and looking forward to going to the Dr. (that is kind of sad in a way I guess) and then going grocery shopping ALONE and taking my own dear sweet time.

I hope your week-end and Thanksgiving are good. wink Love,

Gem

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