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Posted By : pigsarereallycute - 8/16/2010 9:27 AM
There's a guy I really like and we're becoming really close. I'm not very open about my CF, so I haven't told him yet. Is it best to tell him about my illness sooner or later? I'm not sure how he'll react, but right now he's one of my only close friends that is unaware of my CF.

Posted By : Gemsi - 8/16/2010 1:15 PM
Hey there,
 
This is hard one, on the one hand telling straight away can scare people off. However on the other hand, if you leave it too long and then tell him, you're gonna risk breaking up anyway, as you haven't been honest.
 
I have always told straight away, and anyone that bit more serious, have asked questions, looked up CF, got scared, asked more questions-then they've been ok with it. My friend has always had a harder time, though he's getting there now.
 
I think it is totally dependant on the guy you like really. A whole lot of everything is going to depend on how he feels about it all. If he does lose interest though, I'd say it's better you know early on before there are any really strong feelings. Think about how you will describe CF. I always start with it's a bit like asthma, and then add the worser stuff later.
 
Hope this helps, and hope it all goes well
All the best
Gem
Diagnosed with: Cystic Fibrosis, Asthma, ABPA, Clinical Depression, Mild Liver Cirrohsis, Mild Osteopenia, Erythema Nodosum. Waiting for final diagnosis on Muscular Dystrophy type symptoms.
Medication: Creon 10,000, Vitamins A,D+E, Salbutamol, Paracetamol, Tramadol, Nefopam, Ursodeoxycholic Acid, Trazodone, Slow-Sodium, Azithromycin, Metachlopromide, Omeprazole, DNase Ineb, Folic Acid, Adcal-D3. I use PEP and Flutter device as my physio as well as the occasional ABC when bored. Had a Port-a-cath fitted on chest wall since Nov 04
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Sometimes, I feel that I should go and play with the thunder - then I get scared and run away.
I'm from the UK!!!!! If anything I say makes no sense to you, let me know so I know how not to be so English.

Posted By : KotaTWLOHA - 8/26/2010 6:51 PM
My sister had Cystic Fibrosis, she passed away in April, she had the same problem, wasn't open about her disease, but it's better to tell the person.

Posted By : NeefaFeefa - 9/24/2010 3:42 PM
Hey there!
 
I totally know where you're coming from!
The guy I am dating now, well, we've been dating on and off for nearly 4 years, and I just now involved him because I was totally nervous. He always thought I just get sick a lot. But, I told him about my CF recently, not in really strong details, but the basics, and he cared so much he went and read two whole books on the subject, and even better, he's still around!
 
If you care about this guy, and you think he cares about you, I would tell him. Sooner or later it's going to come up, and if there is a chance that he will reject you for it (which he shouldn't) then its better to happen before you both get too involved.
 
I agree with Gem though, when the topic of my health first came up years ago, I too used the "It's like asthma," line. Eventually, he caught on that there was more to it, what with me always being sick, hearing me mention my regular doctor appointments, the fact that they were at a hospital and not a typical doctors office, and I never hide my therapy machines. little stuff like that leads to questions, which leads to more questions, and eventually an earnest interest or a total rejection. Now, after he read those books, I'm sure my bf knows more about the technical aspects of my CF than I do :)
 
Good luck :)

Posted By : mark jones - 9/27/2010 9:57 PM
hello i hope u all dont mind me including myself in this......

please be open about what u have,,,my sister died of cf a long time ago....she was the most stunning girl i have ever met .....and she never lied or twisted the truth.......i have a differant dissease then u,but my wife is very supportive.....

be open its the best way..xxx

Posted By : LaurenSmith - 10/21/2010 9:18 AM
I dated a boy with cf about 6 months about and we dated for just over half a year. He was really open about his cf from the very start and it made it so much easyer to understand and cope with. Be open about it for sure :)

Posted By : midge-lea - 12/1/2010 3:25 PM
i think the best thing is to be compleatly open, as was said before if you tell him and he runs then he's not worth stressing yourself out,
i'v always been open, some were bothered others not so much, my man now is way too supportive lol, he's always telling me i should be going to hospital whenever i have the slightest sniffle, he is good but can be annoying sometimes as i know when i need help and will ask for it. but be honest cos god forbid if your not and something happens and your really ill he wont know whats going on.
xx

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