don't take this as a "dis" but i want to direct this post to christina, before i can't type no longer, so i hope you catch this! i read your posts very caraefully & your days are very much like mine with the RA.
what i would suggest is finding adequate pain meds for relief, believe me, they won't do anything to actually help the RA...but after a while with proper dosage you CAN get to a point whrere the joint pain becomes very manageable.
a pain specialist MD who deals with long term chronic pain patiuents is best.
have you had a real heart to heart with your hubby?
i met my hunny 5 years ago when i was actually a patient of his! before him, every guy i was with did not handle me too well...too much of me being an inconvenience & they (along with my regular friends & girlfriends as well) couldn't understand why i couldn't just do things like normal. there was just no comprehension no matter how much i explained it.
my joe though...God he's been a blessing. i can believe how good he has been.
this is very rare especially when a man is fit, healthy & has never been ill; to have so much compassion & understanding.
he never pushes, never gets angry when i can't do something & is patient.
not knowing anything about your hubby i can't comment too much, but i would make sure he understands your RA completely, what if effects & how it manifests.
i'd also make sure he knows how HE makes you feel better (if he in fact does). for me, just having him hold my hand or place a warm hand on my knee makes the pain better.
i'd tell your hubby the specifics he does that makes your dealing with RA easier.
now, if i'm totally not in the loop & your hubby makes your life totally NOT easier then go scratch all of what i wrote, LOL.
take it one day at a time dear.