thanks guys.....i have alot on my plate right now. my ex- m-i-l is dying and my son (21) left college to go to be by her bedside at his uncles's home in NJ. she doesnt want to die in a hospital so they are going to let her pass away in the uncles's home i guess as peacably as they can. she is in end stage cancer and was given only 6 mos to live and that was in dec.
she is fading fast i understand from my son, who is at her bedside ( taking off from college) and frankly i am upset for my son, as when she goes he will no longer have a grand ma anymore. although i didnt get along with her, i always fostered a good rapport for my son to keep up with her and didnt personally hold a grudge against her.
i went to go to see my cousin who i have not seen in more than 25 yrs who was visiting fl from ny a few days ago. we had a nice reunion and were sad to have let so much time go by inbetween us.( family fights from her mom and my mom fostered this separetion)
i did not tolerate the drive very well ( 2 hrs away) and ended up staying in bed all day today from sheer exhaustion also.
i dont understand why i can not do anything anymore and i feel like a very old person inside. something is sapping my strenght and energy i feel, i cant explain it.
i was supposed to have a nuclear bone scan test where they shoot you full of radioactive dye then tell you to drink lots of water, then come back 3 hours later to put you through a machine to measure the bone density afterwards.
i couldnt take the test b/c the place was 40 miles away and i was too tired to drive it from the drive home from yesterday from seeeing my cousin.
i literally slept all day long and could not get out of bed.
i have to re-schedule the test some place closer to home and asked why the person who told me to take the test didnt tell me where it was located or give me a choice to have it done as an out patient basis at a nearby hosptial instead of making me drive 40 miles one way, get an injection, go home drink lots of water then come back to be scanned.
i have 3 hospitals down the road from where i live that i could get to in minutes to have this done. the woman told me b/c i didnt keep my appt she was going to have to charge me for the injection since she ordered it already. i asked her why she didnt tell me where she was located when she called to confirm the appt and give me directions beforehand.
oh well i am done fighting with people. i dont know how much this test is going to tell me anyways....i have already had many xrays which say the same thing dont they?
all i know is that from last year to this year i have notice a decline in my energy and physical health and well being. and i dont understand why. i feel like i am getting ready to see people who i have not seen in a long time to say goodbye to them.
9-02 crash w/ C-5-6-7 anterior/posterior fusion in neck w/11 screws and 4 metal plates. multilevel HNP at T & L section. FMS, PA in dec 05. on SSDI after 2.5 yr wait. sezuires, CTS, IBS ( C & D). norco, xanax, predisone shots. i dont know what else is wrong with me and neither does anyone else!!!