HELP- Wife of bipolar sufferer!

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New Member

Date Joined Apr 2009
Total Posts : 1
   Posted 4/4/2009 9:59 AM (GMT -7)   
I am writing to you today to ask for your help with an "issue" my husband and I have been dealing with for a long time. After his fathers death, we knew it was time for him to get some "help". However, he always claims to have a "reaction" to the medicines, in fact, he spends hours researching the side effects of his medicine. No matter what the medicine is, he always claims to have the least common side effect.
No onto the greater issue....
He continues to quit taking the medicine due to these "side effects". Also, he plays around with his medicine, thinking he is able to self medicate himself. When he does this, things do not go well. We can always tell when he has played around with the dosage, yet, he refuses to admit it!
What do we do?!
Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated!

Regular Member

Date Joined Dec 2008
Total Posts : 175
   Posted 4/4/2009 11:17 AM (GMT -7)   

yikes! sounds like some OCD in there as well if he's so obsessed with checking "possible" side effects...

what about you giving him his meds at specific times in the proper doses (like a nurse at the hospital) so a) you know he's taking them and b)he's not mixing where he shouldn't be.  Then keep them under lock and key???

(i've hid my husbands ativan in our car so that he can't abuse the medication and i'm the only one with the key and i sleep with my purse in my drawer beside me with a plastic bad wrapped around it so that if "someone" tries to take my purse out of my drawer then i'll wake up - sounds drastic i know but when it comes to bp, sorry, i don't wanna take any chances.)

has he seen a pdoc or even just normal counselling?  maybe hearing it from someone else that he trusts might make a difference.  i don't know what to tell you except that maybe he needs to be admitted to a hospital (psych) until his meds can be regulated by professionals... again sounds drastic, but a lot of us here have either had to admit our loved ones to psych so they can get regulated or some of the sufferers of bp on here have gone themselves to get regulated.
you will have to be more forceful than you want, trust me - but in the end (hopefully) it'll be worth the pain?
"Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed
by the things you didn't do than by the ones you did do."

Regular Member

Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 44
   Posted 4/5/2009 9:11 AM (GMT -7)   
I don't think it is as much OCD as it is a trust issue. I do the same thing.

olivia of course
Veteran Member

Date Joined Jul 2006
Total Posts : 1523
   Posted 4/10/2009 2:52 PM (GMT -7)   

I would like to welcome you to HealingWell and the Bipolar Forum. I hope you find the support you are looking for here.

What you describe about your husband is fairly common, especially when the person who is bipolar has a hard time accepting their illness. From what you said, your husband is trying to find ways to avoid taking all meds, because he probably doesn't believe that his symptoms are that bad.

Does he see a pdoc regularly? Can you go with him the next time he has an appointment? I don't think your husband understand the importance of taking meds regularly, maybe he needs to hear it from the pdoc. Not getting the proper meds, his moods are bound to change more frequently. Please let us know how things work out.

Bipolar Co-Moderator
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Only by seeking challenges can we hope to find the best in ourselves. ~Robert Rodriguez

Don't let your yesterday ruin your today.

New Member

Date Joined Apr 2009
Total Posts : 5
   Posted 4/11/2009 5:47 AM (GMT -7)   

Hey other newbie wife;

My husband plays around with his meds too. He refuses to let me me administer his meds also. I was a nurse and it makes me really angry when we have the horrible results of missed or too much med. when it is so easy to prevent the problem. But, we are dealing with people with a distorted thought process. I don't have an answer, just understanding. Hope he is able to accept diagnosis eventually.

Regular Member

Date Joined Oct 2007
Total Posts : 77
   Posted 4/27/2009 7:47 PM (GMT -7)   
Yeah, I, too am a wife of a bipolar husband.  It will take someone outside your family circle to see the problem and call him on it.  He won't believe you because you are too close to him.  Get a friend or a medical professional to talk to him and make sure that they don't tell him that you asked them to talk to him.

New Member

Date Joined May 2009
Total Posts : 1
   Posted 5/2/2009 11:04 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi im Biopolar also. i used to try to do the same thing by self medicating mysely like that also. never read the side affects like that. But until he accepts that he really has a problem and that he really honestly needs help. the medicine will not work. I turned to the lord and he has done wonders for me. ASK GOD FOR HELP.. HE CAN DO AMAZING THINGS!!!

Veteran Member

Date Joined May 2007
Total Posts : 3715
   Posted 5/3/2009 6:39 PM (GMT -7)   

Welcome to HealingWell and to the bipolar board. I'm glad you're here and that you are feeling well. Please be aware of Forum Rule 10. No posts of an overtly political or religious nature OR posts promoting advocacy of particular personal, medical, legal, religious, political, or non-profit causes. The forums are intended for offering mutual personal support. Debating controversial subjects should be taken elsewhere. Limited religious references are allowed (ie. "my prayers are with you" or a brief quote as part of a larger post), but the forums should not be used to convert others.

Co-Moderator, Bipolar Forum
Bipolar II

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