Well, my story is long so I will try to keep it short. I was raised in an verbally abusive family were my "step dad " was the abuser. His favorite nickname for us was ******. When he eventually died I was 14; that left my mentally retarded mom to care for us totally living off food stamps and the government. Because she was retarded she couldn't work and now gets disability. She up and left when I was 17 but only after her new boyfriend and his son had had there way with me. They went to florida and we didn't hear from her for several years. Luckily I had an aunt who was willing to deal with a moody abused teen. I met my husband when I was 16. We are still married today (10years now). I found out 2 years ago that I have bipolar disorder type 2. After years of ruined relationships and hypomanic episodes I am finally doing some better. Today was not one of my better days. I look for something or someone to be unhappy about
. Not that the things are not valid, but I always seem to overreact about
them and can't get them off my mind. This makes me depressed and very sad. I just want to be alone. My problem today is with my husband. He has gained 50 pounds since we got married. He won't exercise. Overeats. I feel like it is not fair to me for him to be so fat. I have mantained my weight even after 3 children. I have tried to encourage him like my therapist says but nothing works. I know I need to just accept the fact that he is always going to be fat and I might as well let it go. I am not at that place yet. In the past I have used cutting to sooth me. He doesn't know this or hasn't said anything about
it. I know he has noticed the cuts on my arm. Has any one else been there? I go to a support group for people with bipolar, that helps some. But I have social anxiety disorder so it is very difficult to engage. My doc has me on 2 anti anxiety meds just so I can be calm enough to do things like attend these bipolar meetings. Well, I just wanted to share my story. Thanks for reading...
[I edited your post to keep it in line with Forum Rule #1. No discussion of any illegal activity or threats of violence. (ie. illicit drug use, including medical marijuana use, threats of suicide or self-injury, or threatened or intended physical harm). Discussions of suicide or self-harm that are deemed negative and therefore potentially injurious to others are also not permitted.--serafena]
Post Edited By Moderator (serafena) : 4/28/2009 6:22:56 PM (GMT-6)