Skay, I did end up telling them a little about how I was feeling, but it was only after my counselor called my mother and said get her to the er or she would call the cops to come pick me p and take me. I lied to the people at the hospital a little, but because I will not go in to the hospital, but I did tell my mother some of what's going through my head.
BPWife, I know the alcohol isn't helping, I know it just makes it worse...There is no more excuses...Sometimes I just simply like to drink, other times I don't, but I don't know how to stop. I'm 25 and have been drinking since I was 9 or 10.
It's hard to tell my family the truth. Everyone in my family has A LOT of problems. Everything from Cancer to depression to Epilepsy, diabetes, temper issues, etc. My parents take care of us and themselves and are so tired and stressed out. I always grew up holding my feelings in and I have a real problem with asking for help. It always seems like when I get to a place that I know is dangerous, it feels like it's too much of an inconvience to tell anyone. So, I just to what I can and keep it all in and push everything down as much as possible. That's also when the drinking is the worst and in the past when the different kinds of drug use was the worst. I've finally gotten off all of the other stuff, except the drinking and smoking cigaretts. I can't finish I have to go get the baby now....Also, I always get interupted when I need to get something off my chest. Sometimes I just want to scream shut-up and listen to me! But, that's just mean, so I don't...