Hello all I just stubbled across this site a few days ago. It is amazing to see that I am not the only one that is going through this situation. Let me explain mine.
My wife and I are both 27 years old. We've been married for five years now. She was diagnosed bp about 4 years ago. We have had many ups and downs but for the most part her biggest issue was spending and being messy. I thought nothing of it I figured she was just a woman that loved to shop a messy woman. Then she began to have these mood swings and stay up for days at a time the the next week be the complete opposite. I must admit I truly underestimated bp, I wrote it off. I thought it was all in her head. She goes to see her doc about 2x a yr and is not taking any of her meds. Up until now I never really pushed her. I just tried to be understanding and believed her when she said she didn't need them. Within the last year we moved form Jersy to Philly, things were going well. We were out with friends about 5 weeks ago and she began to tell them how much she loved me and how we work so well together and divorce wasn't a option she was so happy with us. The very next day she said she was unhappy with our marriage and she was thinking of divorce, but wanted to work on it before we went that far. She went out of town for 3 days to see family, she came back and said she wanted a divorce. Imagine my shock. She said that she wasn't in love with me anymore, I was shutdown, I push her away and I was holding her back. I suggested marriage counseling, she said no she doesn't need anyone to tell her what she already knows to be true. So we have been separated for the last 30 days. Not so much to work on anything, she said she needed space, so I left. She finally came clean and said she had met a guy and went on a few dates nothing sexual, just wanted attention. I know she developed feelings for him even though she denies it. She says they stopped talking. Its probably because he didn't want to be wrapped up in the divorce, not because she stopped it I'm sure. Over the last 3 weeks I have been going to therapy and suggested her to do the same. She still refuses. This past weekend she called me up telling me she misses me and wants us to work and wants to go to therapy for the marriage and for her bp. She finally acknowledged that she is hurting those close to her. We were scheduled for counseling this past monday. Sunday she called me up and invited me over to tell me no, she wants to continue to stay separated, no therapy and still wants a divorce. At this point I know she's confused I am trying to give her space, I sent her a list of doctors. At this point I just want her to be okay. I love her, I want us to last, but she needs help. I want to hang in there but people are telling e to run. But I can't I wont let the bp beat us. Am I foolish?
We also just had to file for bankruptcy because of her spending habits and her not keeping a job longer than 6 months at a time.
Any thoughts or suggestion would be great.