i've really got myself into a situation with this 10 month relationship with my bipolar girlfriend and need advise. this really gets deep and twisted! im bipolar as well, but my case is a bit more stable than my girfriends.
my girlfriend was molested as a child by a family member, and she went on to seek out abuse thru her life. she worked as a stripper for 10 years and met her exhusband while doing that. she married him and then continued living with him for 10 years after the divorce. he was 15 years older than her, and for lack of a better way to describe the relationship he was her sugar daddy and she was his trophy wife. he didnt really love her, or cant seem to show it. he is an alcoholic. I came into the pic 11 months ago, i really fell in love with her and wanted to marry her. i moved to a new city so she could be near her family. 45 days after doing so she went manic and left me and went back to her ex. she really went off for 35 days while doing this, then decided to come back to me. i loved her so much i couldnt say no. since she has been back with me she has left another 2 times. went back to him, once had sex with him. he is a drug adict as well, so she gets high and he gives her free dope. this has been very painful to me and hard to deal with. she always comes back to me though and wants to get off the drugs, i went through this 18 years ago so i feel i can help her do it. i really feel as long as he is alive he will be there in the shadows waiting to get her back on the drugs and in his life again, which she seems to only want when manic. she has no place else to go. so now its like she is living 2 lives in 2 different cities and with 2 different men.
this has caused me to have to draw on my faith in god to make it, i have talked to my preacher at my church and was told that god understands the situation and its ok, and eventually something will happen and this will stop or something will happen and someone new will come into my life. i just need to have faith that gods will is going to prevail. this has been very hard for me but has made my relationship with god much closer. i really love this girl like no other ive ever known, been told by people it sounds like we are sole mates. are pasts are the same and we have everything in common. i love her so much i really cant see anything she could do that would make me stop loving her. i know ill love her for the rest of my life no matter what! i also know ive got a long hard road ahead of me, but i think i can do it. she has been in the hospital a few times in the past 10 months, and this week she got so depressed because of the drug use she ended up in rehab. now she might get the help she needs. i hope and pray, but think its going to be an ongoing thing.
the bad thing is when she goes manic it triggers my mania as well. i seem to be more stable though, but i feel like running when we have problems as well. but am able to keep my feet on the floor unlike her. i've had to separate our financial lives to keep from having the mess she has going on. all i really can say for sure right now is i love her so much i never knew love before at all. i never would have put myself in this kind of situation in the past.
i dont know what im searching for here, just opinions, advise, warnings, danger signs, and so on. just trying to reach out to gain peace of mind i guess???