Those are symptoms that *can* appear with bipolar disorder. But they could be symptoms of another different disorder. Perhaps one you have not considered. Maybe even google "Asperger's Syndrone." It is a form of austism that does include mood swings, and inability to handle change. She needs to be seen by a psychiatrist!
Do not be afraid to assert yourself. With my ex-husband (undiagnosed bipolar) I had to draw a line (when I was healthy enough to be able to). These boundaries still stand.
- When conversation became heated, I would say, "I am not going to talk about this now.", and walk away.
- If he swears, the conversation is over. If we are on the phone I say "Good-bye" and hang up immediately when he begins to swear.