Since our baby has been born, obviously, our lives have changed. Less us time and more baby time. But i love me wife and i care for her and i am worried. However, my wife appeared to have suffered some depression initially from the birth (which I hear is common unless otherwise told), but that went away. Now, it appears that our marriage is in trouble and not sure if it is me or if any signs indicate something possibly different.
First, a big dispute between my wife and i was raising our children in regards to crying it out attempt. Our kid was not sleeping for MONTHS and i wanted to pursue some method of fixing it (not fully crying) just becuase my wife was not getting any sleep and i could tell she was tired, nor was i getting sleep, but nothing compared to my wife. She just refused to compromise as I was trying to do, and always went to the baby right away. So i gave up because we would end up in fights and not talking over this one issue of raising a child. a lesson to others - talk about raising kids before marriage FYI.
Second, once our kiddo started sleeping again, she then again stopped sleeping and for the past two month my wife takes the kid into our bed and sleeps half of the night with us (and she does not sleep b/c baby is right by her). I feel that this sleep depreviation has caused either bipolar or depression or whatever anyone can help me with here. But our fights started two days ago when she was just being rude to me with commands, do this or just talking mean to me. So i said you know you have been really mean to me the last day. She then went ok, then leave me then and has since slept it our other bed and not talked to me. she always does that. Two days later i left her alone for space and said what did i do, i even bought her flowers and chocolate to apologize for what i said and she said that is not the issue and even said what our the flowers for (i was actually hurt by that reaction, trying to be nice)
Her main argument is that i feel that she is not a good wife, that i expect more out of her, and she says find someone better, i am not happy, etc.... I feel that i am to blame for how rude i was and yes, I am not happy sometimes, but we all have good days and bad. I care for my wife and love her, but she does a total 180 in these fights, but later is fine. I do everything in the house, except cook (laundry, etc..), she is a wonderful mom watching the baby and i think some house chores is not asking for a lot. But it is her reactions and not talking to me that shooks. Maybe I am reaching to far out hear and need some guidance on what i can do, but i am worried for her on how she is good one day and bad next. I feel that i am the problem as well and need to change my attitude to be more happy, but i am feel myself deperssed some days b/c it all stems i think from my wife's lack of sleep the last year.
sorry for this run-on statement, just trying to figure out what to do best.