Posted 9/17/2014 8:24 AM (GMT -6)
Hi! I am new and I need help!!
I have been married to my husband for 20 years. We have had an extremely rocky relationship. I suspect he has bipolar disorder, but need confirmation.
From young my hubby was trouble. He had ADHD and was troublesome at school. He cannot count how many times he was was caned. After standard 7 (Grade 9) he left school and joined the army (which was compulsory).
He started drinking heavily at an early age (13 years) and could consume enormous amounts. He still drinks a large quantity over weekends (about 18 beers in one day). He once took Valium and was fortunately found and rushed to hospital otherwise he would have possibly died of an over dose.
His working history has been a complete mess. When he was young, an apprentice, he would work very long hours, after work he would go out drinking until three in the morning, sleep for two to three hours and then have to go to work. This happened every night. One company gave him over 30 chances (not going to work) until he was fired. He cannot seem to stick to one job without complaining and wanting another. He continually argues with the people at work, to the extent that they do not want to work with him. He is agitated and aggressive. He is always wanting to run his own company (this happened 3 times) and very impulsively he would just resign and say he is starting his own business with no planning. This was of course was disastrous.
He is paranoid about political matters, worries if my son goes out with his friend in the evening (phones him at 10 o'clock if he is not home, which is very embarrassing), and has been very over protective of him since very small. He wouldn't let my son climb tree in case he slipped and fell etc.
He is very difficult and I have to tread very carefully not be tread on his toes. He is agitated and aggressive. He has been abusive physically and verbally (to me).
He has always battled to sleep.
He loves to talk. He will talk and talk for hours on end. In fact, I cannot get a word in.
He definitely has times when he is hyper. We call it full moon. I cannot explain it, but he doesn't wash, he drinks and seems very inflated. At this time, he acts like a silly teenage boy trying to attract attention. My son once said after he was very bad one Sunday, Dad is so full of himself, it is as if he thinks he is the only one around.
My husband's moods are very changing. He doesn't have long periods of hyper behaviour and long periods of depressive behaviour. In fact, his highs are not that high and is lows are not that low. He doesn't sleep for a week when he is low.
Basically he is normal, agitated and aggressive, and then agitated and hyper, and normal etc. etc.
His family has a history of properly diagnosed bipolar disorder, where members have had to go to mental hospitals and been properly diagnosed. (One tried to commit suicide etc.)
He does not think that his behaviour is abnormal and he will not agree to taking 'drugs' to help him.
I am desperate! Can anyone help!