Hi everyone. I was trying to "keep this inside" but it is not good for my GI system. Kevin asked me to talk to my friends on the BP forum.."Honey they accept you and will understand" So my loved ones know how much u mean to me that my husband wants me to come to you all
! I am afraid to post as my sis reads them
! But SO WHAT RIGHT? Let me try to make this as understandable as I can. Sara (girl from sis neighborhood) had a b-day party on Sat. Annette, (the one w/cancer) calls and says Sara wants to talk to u. "Oh Aunt Patti, thank u so very much for the present, I love it so much I havent parted w/it since Sat. I already have over 200 songs on it. So, I figured that Vicki got her an Ipod (which we talked about
, ut I had no idea she actually bot her one). I said thank you baby nd take good care of it. I then called Vicki at her office voice mail and thanked her for putting my name on the card and to tell her how much I owed her. She then sent me an email the next day explaining how stressed she has been at work (accountant), and that she DID NOT put my name on the gift,Sara just assumed it was from both of us. She didnt want me to be obligated. But said if I wanted to pay for half it was $106 (my half). So, I phoned her at the office and actually got her. Initially all went well, I said I wanted to ask if she had been going to a support group to learn how to deal with me for the last 3+ years?Annette had told me this, NEVER said it was said in confidence, and I was FLOORED! I NEVER keep secrets from anyone, not my nature...especially my sister. So she said she was, not for that long tho, maybe a year. I kept telling you I wanted you out of my life, BUT YOU DO NOT HEAR ME! So, I said, well I will let u get back to work. She kept on talking. Finally Randall got brought up and she was furious (as always when u say ANYTHING about
him) and I said Vic do u see how well i have talked about
his and my relationship on the BP forum. She said I dont read that anymore as all u do is lie. I SWEAR ON MY FATHERS GRAVE THAT I HAVE NEVER TOLD ANY OF YOU A LIE
. I just hope and pray that u believe me. So, I said Vic that is not true I have never told them a lie..how can u expect people to help when do not tell the truth??? I said give me an example...so she said, "Do they know u r a drug addict" I said Vicki, I am not a drug addict, the meds I take are listed on my posts along with the illnesses I take them for. So she hung up on me. So, like a dumbass (this is why I am dying inside, I wish I woud have let it go)
, I called her back and she said "I hate you, I hate the sound of your voice,when will u realize how much I despise you? If u ever come near me, my husband or my daughter, via internet, come to my home, my job,etc. I will call the police and have a restraining order against you, and Patti u know I will!" Im devastated
as is Kevin. I guess all the love we have given them obviously doesnt outweigh the way she feels about
you. I know you all think is temporary, now I hope u believe that IT IS NOT. I am begging you all to help me with this. Nickie, I know you said I tend to overact, but like I said I SWEAR TO GOD that this is all true. I havent slept in days and my face is so swollen from crying I cant even leave the house to try to put this out of my mind. I am sure you all are fed up with me too, and think I am a pathetic loser, I know I do. Please try to direct me. I am going to a pdoc at the end of the month, still having suicidal thoughts, but not "acting" on them. I have always taken your advice to heart and done EVERYTHING u advise me to. Please help me. I do not think I have ever been more afraid in my life! I have been takig my valium like they are candy to try to calm down...to no avail. Please understand how much I need and want your advice/opinions? I hope u will post and make me feel better...you always have done so in the past. Please dont give up on me. PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Kevin was talking to my cousin last nite and said "Liz, I have NEVER been more worried about
patti, Vicki is killing her inside." You all know what he does for a living plus he has diabetes since age 12! hE CANT TAKE MUCH MORE EITHER. oUR CONTRACTORS still ARE SCREWING UP AND HE IS ALWAYS FIGHTING WITH SOMEONE (INSURANCE CO., PANTERS, CABINET PEOPLE, ETC.) I am worried about
him, too. He is sick at the fact that we are now LEGALLY not allowed to see Lauren. I hope to hear from someone soon.
Thanks for listening. I am so sorry to ask for so much.