My husband of 37 years has Hypomania. It only took me 37 years to really, really, really get it. He was twice put in the hospital before I met him at age 18 and 20.
The challenge with my husband is that he has long breaks in between Manic Epsiodes like 10 months sometimes.
A friend that is a Mental Health Counselor showed me Sunday December 27th the two page sheet she uses for Hypomania Diagnosis or at minimum tendency with her clients. My husband had everyone except the God Complex one. He has had them at different times. So 37 x 2=74 Manic Episodes.
He gets very verbally abusive during his episodes. They always start with him not getting sleep that is my clue that something is going to happen. He will wake up at 4:30 or 5:00am walk around the house cleaning things he has never cleaned or arranged in our whole married life together. He does the spending spree usually too. WE have a naturopathic clinic and I have gone in to find a new computer, printer. The last big break he came home with a $49,000 car that we did not need or could afford. I had to block the driveway with our other car so he would not drive out of the driveway and we did return it and got a brand new Prius as for cars there is no 3 day return requirement. this time around he wanted me to sign a Home Equity Line of credit for $70,000. I told him I would only do it is a financial consultant told me it was a good idea. He then spnet $1000 for a new website, and I learned 3 days ago he bought an Amethyst Mat for $1,200 that came in 3 days ago. He bought it for my healing as I just had a total hip replacement on Dec. 28th. I decided that I would do nothing until I am fully recovered walking well and driving.
Along with these breaks something always happens where he gets very angry and says "I am gong to Divorce you in 90 days. I am seeing an attorney tomorrow." He does this half the time.
So this round I pulled in 3 men he is close to that know about these "episodes". One made a fantastic 5 Agreement sheet that had 5 items that are really practical:
Here it is:
1. Husband agrees to see a health professional competent in mental health disorders for diagnosis and treatment options, as well as ongoing care. This could be a psychiatrist and/or naturopath. But it must be another competent physician doing the service. A doctor who has himself as a client has a fool for a patient.
2. Wife in good faith agrees to seek counseling or training should Rick request it for a particular issue. Husband must agree to come if the counselor requests his participation.
3. Husband and Wife agree to see a financial counselor and business advisor to evaluate their debts, budget, and business plans. Both sides will cooperate in furnishing all details for evaluation.
4. Husband will agree to attend debtor support groups weekly and in good faith and participation for at least three months or something comparable between the parties.
5. Upon acceptance by Husband of this General Agreement, then a general spending w/o discussion limit(s) on items bought individually or collectively will temporarily be in place until a full review by a financial counselor. The limit will be based on a discussions between Husband and wife. Husband will suggest a limit and Wife will accept or counter until a mutual agreed upon number is reached. Both parties agree to negotiate in good faith to reach an amicable solution.
If at the satisfactory completion of these items items , Husband believes a HE loan is in their interest, and the financial advisor concurs, and satisfactory business plan is developed, and communication line are open, then Wife will sign off the the HE loan.
I sent him this Agreement in the mail before my surgery and he never said anything. This manic Episode started around Dec. 18th. I handed it to him on January 4th and he said he would not sign anything. It was at this point that the man that created the 5 agreement told me I should just heal myself and not do anything until I do that, as stress makes healing take longer.... So I am doing that.
Talking on this forum is healing for me.
My main question is how do you get someone that is a naturopathic doctor and thinks he is "normal" and that he is just reacting to my "anger" to admit and see that he has real Hypomania?
I am fairly sure there are natural treatments for this too. 20 years ago he took Lithium Carbonate for maybe two weeks then stopped.