Hi. I'm new here.

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MA10
Regular Member


Date Joined Oct 2012
Total Posts : 380
   Posted 8/31/2016 3:02 PM (GMT -7)   
Never thought I'd have to use this forum, until today. I "officially" got my diagnosis of bipolar a little while ago. I'm still in a little bit of shock I guess. Though, I've known this day was coming for a while.

Let me take a minute to introduce myself. I have struggled with depression for 5 years now. Several, several, really low periods in this time, including one hospitalization, and almost two others. There have been few really high times as well, but I tend to lean more towards depression than mania. I have been on a wide array of antidepressants and anxiety meds. Throw in a few anti-psychotics as well. I have an autoimmune thyroid disorder called Hashimoto's and I have chronic Lyme disease. So I am a member of several other forums on this site.

In addition to my CRAZY amount of other prescriptions and supplements that I have to take for my other health concerns, I will be weaning off of my Tofranil and Remeron to replace it with Lamictal and Latuda starting tomorrow. Any insight into this diagnosis or these medications would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks for welcoming me in.

-MA
Got mono in fall 2011. Suffered with severe depression since fall 2012. Diagnosed with Hashimoto's fall of 2013. Diagnosed with Lyme fall of 2015. Non-CDC but several bands positive and positive antibody test via Igenex. Currently treating with Byron White A-L complex, Cowden's Burbor and Pinnella, 200mg Tofranil, 45mg Remeron, 20mg Propranolol, Ambien, random array of supplements.

Tim Tam
Veteran Member


Date Joined May 2016
Total Posts : 1103
   Posted 8/31/2016 5:36 PM (GMT -7)   
Welcome to the website MA10.

I also have bi-polar. Did the other illnesses bring you into depression? Although it was one full year before you got really bad depression from when you first got mono.

Does the mono ever get better?

Is there anything going on good in your life that you can concentrate on?

I'm on Remeron anti-depressant, my generic of that is Mirtazapine.

It seems to work for me, is it not working for you?

Are you so sick, you can't get out of your house?

What I'm thinking is, if you could help someone, like in a volunteer thing, it might refocus your psychic energy going out to someone else's problems rather than going in towards your own.

I take Lithium for the mania. Do you take anything for that?

It's good that you reached out for help.

Do you look forward to watching TV or anything like that?

What were you officially diagnosed with before you got the bi-polar diagnosis?

I don't know why you dreaded it. I was glad to finally find out what I was after 20 years of being miss-diagnosed.

It wasn't a doctor who finally figured it out with me. It was a lay counselor, who happened to know my uncle. He said, "Your uncle was m-d and you probably are, too."

That was a relief. If you don't have the right dx you don't get the right medicine. When I got on Lithium for being m-d, I felt like the air had been let out of a balloon. I didn't know I had been so tensed up.

I wish I had been on it sooner. How many years did it take them to finally diagnose you right?

Sometimes they can still be wrong. You can check on the web, under bi-polar, to see if they got it right this time.

MA10
Regular Member


Date Joined Oct 2012
Total Posts : 380
   Posted 8/31/2016 7:12 PM (GMT -7)   
I don't know if they got it right or not. I am more inclined to believe that it is a physical outflow from Lyme disease and under active thyroid. Yes, the illnesses did cause my depression, anxiety, etc.

I don't think I can take lithium because of Lyme disease, and I'm not completely sure if I can take these two drugs yet with the Lyme disease treatment. I have to do my own research because no one doctor deals with everything for me.

The mono aka EBV is probably still wreaking havoc on my body, but I'm so sick with Lyme disease that I don't notice it anymore.

Yet, I currently work 3 jobs. A part time job at an insurance company for 37 hours, a tutoring job for 4, and I own my own freelance business. I don't have time to be sick. And consequently not really a lot of time to heal either.

She's taking me off Remeron. I loved it. But she doesn't think it's helping because I haven't slept even with it this week.

Anything going on good? Ehh. Currently I'm more manic than depressed so yea. Life is good. Until I crash in a week or two.

I guess before bipolar it was major depressive. But literally every doctor since then has told me it was related to my thyroid.

I don't watch tv. And really don't have time for enjoyable things either. I work, eat, sleep, repeat.
Occasionally get food with a friend.

Why I dreaded it? Because I don't want to be on the medicine. I want off of medicine, but I keep getting put on more and more. When's enough? I just don't want to be drugged. My brain is already suffering enough because I literally have bacteria burrowed into my brain, so naturally I'm going to be depressed or anxious or manic. I don't need medicine to mess my brain up even more. But whatever. Maybe it'll be a good thing.

I didn't want help, because I didn't think it was a problem. I enjoyed wallowing in my depression, and I enjoyed having my manic periods. I don't want medicine to take those things away from me.
Got mono in fall 2011. Suffered with severe depression since fall 2012. Diagnosed with Hashimoto's fall of 2013. Diagnosed with Lyme fall of 2015. Non-CDC but several bands positive and positive antibody test via Igenex. Currently treating with Byron White A-L complex, Cowden's Burbor and Pinnella, 200mg Tofranil, 45mg Remeron, 20mg Propranolol, Ambien, random array of supplements.

UserANONYMOUS
Forum Moderator


Date Joined May 2011
Total Posts : 4427
   Posted 9/1/2016 6:46 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi MA10,

Welcome to the Bipolar forum :-). I am glad you posted here. Thank you for sharing a bit about yourself with us.

I am sorry for all your health issues. I too suffer from depression. It can be hard especially when we feel low.

Are you attending any therapy? I am not a fan of meds as well, but this is because of my history with it. However, I know that meds can help us. Both meds and therapy work together to help us feel better.
I too feel like my life is just a routine that I keep repeating. I use coping techniques to help me feel better.

I hope the change in meds today would help you.

UA
Moderator - Bipolar

Depression, Borderline Personality Disorder.
Chronic Pain - Cervical Kyphosis, Cervical Spondylosis, Thoracic Scoliosis.

MA10
Regular Member


Date Joined Oct 2012
Total Posts : 380
   Posted 9/1/2016 7:09 AM (GMT -7)   
Yea. I'm in counseling. But haven't seen my counselor in close to a month. See him next week.

Not really looking forward to this med change. But I guess I'll just have to try it and see what happens.

Thanks for welcoming me aboard.
Got mono in fall 2011. Suffered with severe depression since fall 2012. Diagnosed with Hashimoto's fall of 2013. Diagnosed with Lyme fall of 2015. Non-CDC but several bands positive and positive antibody test via Igenex. Currently treating with Byron White A-L complex, Cowden's Burbor and Pinnella, 200mg Tofranil, 45mg Remeron, 20mg Propranolol, Ambien, random array of supplements.

Tim Tam
Veteran Member


Date Joined May 2016
Total Posts : 1103
   Posted 9/1/2016 10:04 AM (GMT -7)   
MA10:

Well, that answers that question, are you able to get out?

Yeah, you have 3 jobs. Whew! You really do get out.

Which is a good thing, but 3 jobs. Whoa!

You said,

"She's taking me off Remeron. I loved it. But she doesn't think it's helping because I haven't slept even with it this week."

I'm on Remeron anti-depressant, also, which I take as the generic, or, Mirtazapine, which does me really well, also, to the point that I can sit down and write this.

But the Remeron/Mirtazapine anti-depressant, plus my Lithium for mania, didn't put me to sleep, either.

But this is what helped me.

You might want to give it a try before you get on a new med. You may not want to, it's up to you and your psy.

I take a heath food store capsule called "Power to Sleep," and its put me to sleep fior the past several months.

The bottle says you can take two capsules. So, if the first one doesn't do it after however long, you might want to try a second.

I was taking Melatonin health food store item for sleep, and it put me to sleep, but it made me so groggy in the morning, it was difficult to get back up the next a.m.

So I switched from Melatonin to Power to Sleep health food store sleep aid, and it put me to sleep at night and made me less groggy in the a.m.

I would try this before you start your new med, to see if it works, if it doesn't you can change. (Again, I don't know your situation, so you want to make sure everything is OK before you do this.)

From taking the health store sleep aid, I was able to quit taking the Ativan tranqualizer, so I wasn't as groggy in the a.m. and could get up earlier.

Someone on this board also mentioned "Alteril" as a health store sleep aid.

These tablets can be bought at a health food store or on the net.

You can also look up on the net search engine, health food sleep aides, or something like that, and see what it says.

Maybe when your brain calms down you can come off of some of the meds.

You are a trooper.
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