I know a few of you have heard this - but im really really frustrated tongiht, so im going to ask all of you the burning question in my mind.
Can doctors really do anything, or do they just want your money?
I have had sooo many uncaring doctors who have told me things werent wrong with me - Physically and mentally. This year I lost all trust in doctors after countless appointments in countless areas, and trips to the ER. Then BP came up, and i decided giving a doctor a chance with that was my only option.
Lately I havent been stable (big surprise) mostly due to some medication changes that just arent working. But the only solutions my doctor has for me is ot drive an hour, and pay him for fifteen minutes of my time, and drive back, and do it again in two weeks when my meds just dont work out. If he isnt in the office, i have no where else to go. Im just confused, because he seems to care and know what hes talking about and all that - but i just feel like im paying $100 to see doctors every month (not much really - but for the income i have now, it is) and im getting no where.
I know im just being selfish and he cant always be there, and i should go in to see him and all that - but its so hard. Ihate taking meds as it is, now all this. Im ready to just bag it all. Whats the difference? Im all over the place anyhow - meds or no.
GAH. How do I get through this? What do you guys do? Am i expecting too much? Or too little? Or what? I dont even know what a doctor is supposed to be able to do - I guess. All I know is that a large part of me hates them, and a larger part of me has always fears Pdocs, and IM dreading my appointment next week even though i need it desperately. My doctor wanted to get me in this week, but i couldnt make it in when he had a time, so im scheduled for next week. But I really just want to cancle it.
Do any of you ever feel this way? Or am i just really really really crazy?