Posted 5/15/2017 5:17 PM (GMT -7)
Your husband is lucky to have you, which he won't figure out until you're gone, which is probably what you'll have to do.
You say you already have separated, so that's a start, to something.
You say, "I made him leave and we have been separated the last 6 months but because of our son we are still in touch daily."
In my marriage, I was the bipolar, many years not diagnosed properly, I was diagnosed depressive, because I would go into the doctor's office depressed. They never bothered to ask, "Do ever have racing thoughts?" and questions like that to see if I was also manic at time.
So they would give me an anti-depressants, which could send me into mania, because I had nothing to stop that, like Lithium.
But it sounds like your husband has been diagnosed correctly, but you say he won't take his medicine. He refuses to take medicine, but he will take street drugs. Probably nobody but a bipolar would understand that.
You might have to do him like I have to do my brother and sister: keep miles and miles of distance between the two individuals or groups.
Waxed sympathetic at his latest quandary, but from 10 miles away.
If he gets better, congratulate him, from 10 miles away, because we know what's coming next. We don't know what form it will take, but we know it's coming.
Sounds like you might be in the best of positions, 10 miles away. A phone call every now and then, then hang up and get back to your life.
With you making your own money, and him not making any, you're in a good position, you just don't know it.
You say, "He still says that he loves me but he is afraid to do anything and I am just as scared." What does that mean? Afraid to get back together?
You say, "I don't want to abandon him, I love him and some days he knows it and other days he could care less."
I would have all the emotions in the books. From 10 miles away. I would let him explain his latest ventures, for 10 minutes. And then I'd hang up and go back to my life.
You know he's going to be 100% high one day, and 100% low the next. The only thing you can do is stay away from all of that, so that his misadventures don't affect you.
The only thing you can do wrong, is get right next to him in the same house, and have to listen and live with these wild upswings and downswings, which will then affect you because you live right beside him.
You already know what he's going to do: he's going to be wild all over the board. You can't stop him, but you can control yourself by not living with him and being affected by his behavior.
Again, I think you're doing right. I think you're cured. Just keep doing what you're doing about him: absolutely nothing.
I think you should give yourself a medal for making it this far.