Yeah, that sounds pretty rough.
Now, here's my story at about your age.
I got fired from a job, as usual, was living on my own in an apartment, 225 miles from my mother, was not use to taking care of myself for I was the youngest child, who was use to my parents and older brother and sister making all the decisions for me.
I got depressed from losing the job and not having any socialization, and I'm in big trouble.
I waited 3 or 4 weeks going in circles trying to figure out what to do, and I had a nervous breakdown. Then, I was able to get some psychiatric help, put on some medicine (the worst in the world, stelizine (sp?) anti-psychotic), and then with the help of a job, got better.
You say, "So usually with my bipolar I go between mania and mixed episodes and a little bit of depression. I have never been this depressed so I don't really know how to handle it. I sit and stare. My mind is to busy reminding me that I am alone for me to concentrate on anything else."
Yeah, I have an idea of what you're going through.
You say, "So my doctor is switching me to rexulti from 800mg of seroquel."
drugs.com says, "Rexulti (brexpiprazole) is a serotonin-dopamine activity modulator (SDAM) used for the treatment of schizophrenia and as adjunctive treatment of major depressive"
Yeah, I was on that stelizine anti-psychotic for a good while, and it did help, although I didn't particularly like it. How are you doing on it?
I had a rough marriage, also, so I know what heck in the home is. I didn't really want to live along, either, and it would have been difficult in my emotionally upsetting state, difficult is not quite the word, but living in that house wasn't real easy, ether.
I know it could be difficult, but trying to be positive that you can do the best you can with the next problem, could be a help.
For the tough times you've been through, you've done pretty well.