Posted 2/28/2020 2:14 PM (GMT -6)
I think that is very good.
One of the things I would like to say is, when you go in to see the psychiatrist you’ll go in as depressed. He’ll sit there for 15-30 minutes and won’t say anything. He’ll write you out a script for a pill, he may mumble “anti-depressant.”
You’re fixing to waste 15 years of your life being miss-diagnosed, miss-medicated and miserable. It’s just a wild guess. During those 15-30 minutes of being silent, he could have said, “Do you ever have a racing mind?”
He could have thought, “Well, if she’s depressed, she could be manic-depressed, so why don’t I ask her if she’s ever had a racing mind, a sign of mania?” I don’t why they don’t ask that.
So, you might want to go in prepared. You might want to download the signs of bipolar, including the signs of mania. Check off the ones you have and read them off to him. OK. Just a little preparation there.
Also, if you type into the search engine, “Do I have biopolar?” or something like that. You’re looking for a site that can ask you 20 questions and if you answer 15 of them in a certain way it may indicate you have bipolar. Again, take the list to the psychiatrist, one for you and one for him.
See what he thinks and if you think he’s completely off base you can get another doctor.
I have a female psychiatrist so I seem to be better with that. Also, medicine has side affects, but I choose to take the medicine because it helps.
Also, I think the medicine will help, but at times I have to remind myself that I have a major mental illness, bipolar. I don’t think about it a lot of time, but I still have difficulties.
Be myself, I often don’t feel my mental illness. In a social situation, I can. So, what I’m saying is, there can still be difficult times ahead, but I think if we think positive, we will do better, and maybe even give ourselves credit for doing well a lot of the time even though we do have a major mental illness.
I use the positive thinking many times a day. If a container of water spills on the floor, I immediately start the positive thinking, get some rags and clean it up. I can use that process 10 times in an hour, 10 times a project, as I break each part of the project down into one positive step.
You say, “I wish I could give my kids the sense that they are okay as they are. But I don’t believe about myself.”
Well, if you feel positive about yourself, you’ll feel the same way about them and they’ll feel the same away about themselves. And you can tell them directly, “You did a really good job with that.” And “I appreciate your help.” Look for an excuse to praise them.
If you raise them negative they will be negative.
Set up rewards such as popcorn and movie night, or bikes in the park or down a nearby road or in a nearby neighborhood. Use your worry and your positive thinking to think up what might be enjoyable for them five minutes from now, a week from now.
If a bike needs fixing for that, think about fixing it. Maybe an above ground pool for the summer.
You say, My “thing” is constant scanning and diagnosing: what’s wrong, what’s broken, how can I fix it, what can I do, what improvements next, etc. I’m always looking for solutions but at the expense of being okay with things as they are.”
I don’t think there’s anything wrong with wanting to make things better. Here’s a saying:
“And now that you don’t have to be perfect, you can be good.”
—John Steinbeck, East of Eden
And “You are your best thing” Beloved, Author: Toni Morrison, 1987
And “Anyone who ever gave you confidence, you owe them a lot.”
Breakfast At Tiffany's Truman Capote, 1958
And, “I know not all that may be coming, but be it what it will, I’ll go to it laughing.”
Moby Dick Author: Herman Melville, Year: 1851
"Even though the world doesn’t understand you, it needs you. It needs people like you because you give it balance, you give people hope and you remind people that it’s okay to real, soft and vulnerable. You remind people that it’s okay to be a non-perfect human being.
— Rania Naim, To The Ones Who Are Tired Of Apologizing For Their Feelings
"At the end of the day, you’re entitled to every one of your feelings. Don’t allow anyone to belittle you for your sensitivity. Vulnerability does not make us weak; it makes us human.
— Melissa Kerman, To Anyone Who’s Afraid Of Being Vulnerable
"True strength is knowing that you don't have to be strong every single second of the day."
— Mandy Hale, The Single Woman
"Strength comes from your vulnerability, and being able to step outside of your pride, your protective shell, your fear and say, ‘I need help.’"
— Marisa Donnelly, It’s Okay To Ask For Help, You Know
"It takes true strength to be vulnerable. It takes real strength to open up about the things that make you uncomfortable. It takes real courage to admit you’re having problems and struggling because it’s hard. Hiding your problems and pretending they aren’t eating you alive is the real weakness."
— Becca Martin, You’re Allowed To Have Moments Of Weakness