Glad you found the website :)
While my medical problems are CFIDS and mild Anxiety, I do understand what your perspective is and how it can be frustrating and scary at times. My x was bi-polar and was on Paxil for years. (The Paxil didn't help him much). One minute, he's happy and laughing, next minute, he's crying in my lap, next minute he's angry... it CAN be hard on loved ones. There was times I felt helpless and like there was nothing I could do to help him... but that wasn't true at all!
I know it's harder for you because you're so far away, but simple things like talking to her when you get the chance, and keeping in constant contact, letting her know you're there and being there for her in any way you can helps a ton!
Me and my X didn't split up because of his bipolar disorder, it was for a different reason, but about a year or so after we split up I ran into him at a store. He thanked me for being there for him while he was going through a difficult time, and he's actually learned how to manage his life and illness without meds... is married... and happy. Some people do need the meds to help them, and there's nothing wrong with that. But it meant the world to me knowing that the efforts I did make helped him out a lot... as I'm sure you'd be doing for your other half.
One of the most important things to anyone on this board is having someone who is at least understanding of what they're going through, and acknowledging the illness, and you're definately going the right way!
I don't know how her family is with accepting her illness and being there for her, but let her know that if she wants to talk to someone when she can't get to talk to you that understands, feel free to let her know that I'm here for chatting if she needs anything. One of the things that I think everyone on this board has in common no matter the illness is that these illnesses are often highly misunderstood and often downplayed by many.
As of this moment, the only people I have near me that even try to understand CFIDS (my main illness) and accept it, is my grandma, my dad (who lives in Virginia) and there's a guy in my car club that has a sister that has it. The most important thing is to have people there that do understand and try to. You're out there serving our country, and I'm sure that's really hard on you because you want to BE there for her, but you can't... and I'm sure she understands that and that you're doing everything you can. A new diagnosis is always something it takes most people some time to get accustomed to and accept themselves.
But like I said, if she could use an extra person to talk to, feel free to have her get a hold of me, and I'll do anything I can to help.
Bless you for serving our country, and I pray all is well, and pray she can hang in there! Let me know if you need anything ok?
I have chronic fatigue syndrome, anxiety (at this current moment), and some minor abdominal pain which still hasn't been figured out yet... need a break from all the testing ;)
CFS: Provigil 200mg, once a day
Anxiety: Lorazepam .5 or 1mg 3xs a day or as needed