I just found this web-site and I can honestly say, I am glad I did. I don't feel so alone, I just feel bad that we are all in the same situation with our children. I have 2 children, 12 year old girl and 9 year old boy, both of them fight like cats and dogs. My daughter is mild MR and has social issues and a language disorder, she is around a 4th grade level.
My son is the opposite, smart as a whip, too smart. He mimicks every behavior he sees, especially from her. When he was 5 the school thought he was ADHD, I thougth he was spoiled because he is cute and was always getting his way. Everyone outside of the family continued to spoil him, give him everything, always telling him he is cute. By the time he was in 1st grade, it was a nightmare, I was in school all the time, he was running out of class, verbally abusive, physically abusive etc. all because he was bored and he didn't like it when he was told he couldn't do what he wanted. I had a therapist go into the classroom and observe him, she said it was the wrong class for him and the teacher, she just did not have the patience, and he figured out how to get out of the classroom by misbehaving, the pricipal refused to move him to another class. 2nd grade was a little bit better, I did try him on different meds for ADHD, he just got worse, it didn't surprise me because I didn't think it was ADHD. I tried Strattera which seemed to help a little but the side affect for him was mood swings (outbursts of anger/frustration). They said his mood/frustration was bad so I stopped the Strattera. Part of this mood thing though was that the teacher kept making promises to him that she never followed through with, so she just kept feeding into his attitude and his behavior. He is now in 3rd grade, the school has agreed that they can not handle him any longer because he is out of control (no kidding I said) I had been telling them that for years, is now in a 45 day program and they say he can not go back into public school because of his needs. He has also been seeing a councelor once a week. He is now on Strattera again, moods/frustation started again which actually have always been there except now he gets over things quicker. At times he can be out of control, physically, verbally abusive, distructive and loves making up stories (he is trying to get me all to himself and telling stories about my husband and daughter) etc. There has not been any clear diagnosis, some say ADHD, others say Anxiety with a little ODD. The pychiastrist now wants to try him on Abilify. I am not crazy about meds, however, I want him to be safe, I also want the family to be safe from him too. He is only 60lbs and about 4ft tall, I don't want to start pumping him up with all of these drugs and have him get more messed up. I am going out of my mind with his behaviors when he doesn't get what he wants, he just gets so mean and usually throws things (his gameboy or something). Does anyone know anything more about Abilify or even if it will help him out with the frustrations/moods that he exhibits when is told NO? I just don't know what to do any more with him, he is a charmer, cute and knows how to play people. It is really scarey because at 9 years old he shouldn't be so good at getting what he wants from people, but he knows how to do it. I know I am rambling on, but any help or advice anyone has would be helpful. Thanks