hello kenny. welcome to healing wekk and to the bp forum. i have found this forum to be a wonderful dysfunctional family. i hope that you do. too.
kenny, only a psychiatrist (we shorten this to pdoc) can diagnose bp. it is a hard illness to diagnose bacause most people with bp (like myself) are in a depressive state most of the time and present this to the dr. the dr seldom sees the manic side, for the reason, a diagnosis may take several sessions.
i;m sure that you're bright and intelligent (most people with bp are) but would you let a grocery clerk perform heart surgery on you? i know that you're not a grocery clerk - and i'm not knocking them - but they simply are not trained and ediucated and experienced in the field. kinda like you trying to diagnose yourself. the most you can say is that you know htat something is wrong and that you believe it may be bp. there are several great bp web sites (can't remember the addresses) that will help you get a better handle on the disease, what it is, what it's symptoms are, how it's treated, etc. simply query bipolar disorder in your search engine.
basically, bp is a life long illness and is caused by a brain misfunction. it is not actually a mental illness - is is a physical disease, like diabetes. it is most commonly, and most effectively. treated with drugs and "talk therapy." it will never go away or heal but, like diabetes, it can be effectively controlled. but, like with diabetes, there are some cases that cannot be controlled. i'm saying this simply for the sake of comoleteness - it's not a warning or anything. only a very small percentage of people with bp are resistant the the therapy.
i've given you quite a mind dump. sorry about that. but i do hope that it is useful to you. also nice to have another male around here. most of the people who arite are female.