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Regular Member

Date Joined Feb 2004
Total Posts : 130
   Posted 12/15/2006 3:18 PM (GMT -7)   
things are really bad depression is terrible no longer taking meds stopped about a week ago isolated myself from everyone somthing i have not mentioned before i have started drinking heavily for the last couple of months never have before it helps when iam drunk problems go away for a while ive replaced my meds with alcohol  ive stopped seeing my doc i thought i could cope boy was i wrong i am not sure what happens next.

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jul 2006
Total Posts : 1123
   Posted 12/15/2006 3:45 PM (GMT -7)   
what do any of us do when we've found that we made a mistake (politicians excluded, of course)?  as that song says. "pick yourself up. dust yourself off, and start all over again."  (sorry, can't remember the name of the song).
i think we all knew that you would end up where you are when you told us what you were planning to do.  you exercised free will - which is what makes yiou a human being.  now it's time to clean up the mess and get on with the rest of your life.
first, get an immediate appointment with your pdoc - of if you don't feel like he/she was really helping you, get qa different pdoc.  next thing, stop the drinking.  i self medicated with johnney walker and various drugs to the point that i don't even remember 1970.  but put the sause away.  when you come off it, it only makwes you feel worse.  i DO remember that.  next, describe your entire history with this illness to the new pdoc (if you elec to get a new one),  go over what worked and what didn't work and come up with a first cut at a proper medication cocktail.   i say first cut because, as you know, it will have to be tweeked every now and then.
that should get you started.  i'm glad that you tried what you did.  if you hadn't you would have always wonders "what if."  better to get it out of you at your age than at mine.  lol
here's to felling better and a happy holiday season for you, gaz!

Regular Member

Date Joined Nov 2006
Total Posts : 30
   Posted 12/15/2006 6:40 PM (GMT -7)   
Hey, getting off meds is tough... Though I still believe it can be done, the depression afterwards will probably be very long term. I stopped my medication about 2 years ago for well over 20 months. Was it bad?? of course it was because my depression lasted for about 8 months. My last depression, with meds, only lasted about 3 months....

I'd like to say that things will get better for you, but I think they will get worse before that happens. You're probably at the worst part of BP cycle and there is really nothing to do but just keep toughing it out.

As for drinking more at this point, a very bad idea. The temporary benefits will easily make everything worse in the long run. I too, actually, have been drinking a bit since just completing my latest well logging job. Fortunately, I'm feeling well, and only drink a very meager amount when I go out now. Too much or possibly any can send you spinning, its a dangerous game and one quite a few BP people I know play. The peices always have to be put back together though, and its going to be much more difficult if you have to combat excessive drinking this time as well.

I would just like to say "keep going", you're at a point most of us will eventually return to (no matter how pessimistic that sounds). You're a intelligent person, and from reading your previous posts, I know that you are aware of what you need to do. It's just not easy to do it when you're down in the hole. Stay tough...


New Member

Date Joined Dec 2006
Total Posts : 7
   Posted 12/15/2006 10:49 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi, I'm new here. I understand where you're coming from because I've been off meds for a long time. I was doing okay until some major stresses happened in the last couple of months and now I know I have to go back on meds again, at least until I get stabilized.

Keep in mind that alcohol is a depressant so it's only going to make you more depressed. I know it feels good while you're drinking (BTDT) but in the long run, it'll just drag you down.

Take care of yourself.
~ Cat Goddess
Accept that some days you are the pigeon, and some days you are the statue.

Veteran Member

Date Joined Sep 2006
Total Posts : 657
   Posted 12/16/2006 4:36 AM (GMT -7)   

Really good advice there guys.

Yes you really should contact pdoc or find another one - there's no point in needlessly going through this on your own , they're there for you to use.

Take care Gaz - you CAN work through this.

Thinking of ya ,

Smiler tongue

Bipolar Moderator
DX : Bipolar , Panic Disorder , GAD , OCD.
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Regular Member

Date Joined Sep 2006
Total Posts : 362
   Posted 12/16/2006 9:22 AM (GMT -7)   


Please get yourself to a doctor. All the advise given to you is very good and logical. Don't let it pull you down further. Then you are letting it win. I wallowed yesterday and today I feel much better. But if you're there too much, you want to stay. That's how I am. I have to pull myself out at some point or drown. You sound like you are drowning. Grab onto something and pull yourself out. 

Take Care,
    "God grant me the serenity to accept the things I can not change, the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference."
  DX: ankylosing spondylitis, periferal neuropathy, chronic migraines/headaches, depression/panic attacks, bi-polar, hypothyroidism, hypoglycemia, sleep apnea
  RX: synthroid, estradiol, cymbalta, prozac, geodon, lamictal, inderal la, klonopin, seroquel, imiprimine, aspirin, (relpax, phenergan, esgic plus, xanax, PRN for migraine)
  Surgeries: hysterectomy 1997, tonsillectomy 2001, deviated septum 2005, cataracts (both eyes) 2006

Elite Member

Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 12/22/2006 7:29 PM (GMT -7)   
Total agreement
I ws in a dark hole a place I will never ever let self go back too I scared hubby and daughter so bad they were going to take me to hospital and have me admitted
I did not want that at all ..........
I sat for almost a couple of weeks and to use Chelle's phrase I wallowed and I cried constantly didnt care about nothing and stayed in that chair days passing me by
FINALLY I got mad at self and I made self just kick my own butt and get back to the land of the
I honestly am glad I did I have felt so much better for doing it, as well as making my loved ones feel better
I have bouts of depression not many I mostly suffer from Anxiety and Panic but this was the worst I let self get
Thanks to the great ppl here and my family at home here I am doing so much better .........and ppl read that and saw the changes that were taking over me when in that hole
I am glad I had all the ppl and support I did plus the anger at self for getting that way and it also helped me ..........
All advise is good and I had to share my dark place
Please do as ppl said get help and dont let it take you down further..........
Keep us posted please
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               God Bless .........Lyn

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