1st I would like to invite you to the HW family.
I'm with Shine on this, I have been diagnosed for almost 3 years and have had BP for at least 5. So I do know a little about BP, and what you describe does not trully describe BP.
As much as you are scared of Drs., you need to get this checked out by them or a trained person.
Yes, and some of the hallucinations are after you are asleep, so they might be how you conscious processes the ugly things going on around you. You have gone through a lot of rough changes.
Hhallucinations that can occur as one is falling asleep and hypnopompic hallucinations occur when one is waking up.
When you hallucinate you know you are, and this is a good thing, you are not retached from reality.
I have had hallucinations before, and they are no fun.
I hope you can talk to someone and get things sorted out. Hang in there.