Posted 11/26/2007 6:50 PM (GMT -6)
I am insuch a bad way right now, I just don't even know what to do with myself any more. I did call my pdoc's office today and of course he wasn't in today. But I was able to get an appointment for tomorrow afternoon, so we will talk about meds and possible hospitalization. I feel everything is just crashing down around me and I just can't control. I've been crying most of the day - the thought of another hospitalization scares me, not really sure why but it does. This is a tough time of year with Christmas coming up - haven't even started shopping yest - even though it's all going to be done online because I'm not going out to the stores. My husband has an infection just below his lip from an ingrown hair and he just told me tonight that he needs to watch it very carefully because he could end up in the hospital - great, one more thing to add to my worry list. Not to mention my daughter and getting her in to see the allergist to have her tested for allergies, get some treatment going so we can stop her sneezing fits that some times last up to two hours.
I just don't feel that I can leave, but I am a mess - my thoughts are racing, I'm eating almost nothing, just drinking tons of water, I'm waaaaaaaaay more talktive than usual and I feel like I can't stop it, I'm not sleeping much - I'm up til 2 or 3 am and back up at 6 and feel okay. I haven't even felt the need to nap, which is highly unusual for me when I only get a few hours of sleep, I can't concentrate on anything except my sewing - that's the one thing that's keeping somewhat sane. Other than that I get distracted really easily, I am constantly losing my train of thought while talking, I go to another room to get something and I can't remember why I'm there so I'll go back to see what I needed, remember it, go to the other room again to get it and once again forget it again.
Although I don't feel that I should leave, I feel like I need to be in the hospital to get more stable than I am now. I just don't know. I'm so confused and I just cannot believe that this is how my life is now since this diagnosis.
Agoraphobia, Barrett's Esophagus, Bipolar Disorder, Depression, Fibromyalgia, Mitral Valve Prolapse, Panic/Anxiety Disorders, Probable Narcolepsy, PTSD, Restless Leg Syndrome, Severe Acid Reflux, Sleep Apnea, Social Anxiety
Meds: Abilify, Ambien CR, Ativan, Flexeril, Lamictal, Neurontin, Nexium, Requip, Ritalin ER
A slip of the foot you may soon recover, but a slip of the tongue you may never get over.