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Regular Member

Date Joined Mar 2007
Total Posts : 58
   Posted 3/4/2008 2:18 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi everyone..
I have something that I'm pretty worried about and I would like some feedback on anyone who has any comments on it..I have crohn's disease and I post on the crohn's board all the time, so I thought that this forum might help.
Anyway, it's my mom. She had breast cancer around 8 years ago, went through chemo and radiotherapy, lost all her hair, got a masectomy- the works, but then she was all clear (yipee!). However, lightening struck twice for her, and around 6 years ago, developed primary breast cancer once again in the other breast. She was going to get another masectomy but they found out that it spread to her bones (her hip) and in the last 2 years, a part of her lungs. Test results have showed that the cancer has been contained but lately she has been experiencing a LOT of back pain, has lots loads of weight, is sick all the time...she wasn't even this bad when she had cancer and the intense chemo the first time...I call her a little terrier because she's small,but a fighter!!
Anyway, I'm 22, in college, and because of my crohn's my mom tends to worry a lot about me (!) so sometimes sheilds important information from me...She's getting tests done on her bones in a few weeks and I have a bad gut feeling..I want to be naive because I honestly couldn't take a shock if it has spread and the prognosis is bad, but at the same time, I don't want to be sick with worry uncessarily....has anyone been in similar situations? should I brace myself for the worst??...

Regular Member

Date Joined Mar 2005
Total Posts : 316
   Posted 3/4/2008 5:57 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi HD,

I'm sorry to hear about the latest with your mother. It's not easy seeing those we love with health issues, and you both have your share. One thing to keep in mind is that worrying won't change anything. Prayer will help. Sometimes we feel better when we worry and picture the worst so that we prepare ourselves, all human nature. Perhaps it would be good to have a full heart-to-heart with your mother so that she knows how that you are capable of helping her emotionally and any other way if there is a new diagnosis, and she will confide in you like the friend it sounds like you are. Daughters are very important to mothers, and vice versa, so just keep listening and being there for her. We're here any time you need to talk and to share news.

Hang in there, hon.

The finger of God touches your life when you make a friend.
----Mary Dawson Hughes---

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jul 2003
Total Posts : 2921
   Posted 3/5/2008 6:19 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi Hipsy,

I didn't see any mention of your mom seeing her oncologist regularly but you mentioned she is having tests done next week. She should have been under care, even if as an annual thing for tests, etc. My daughter is fighting a recurrence that happened at eight years. She was not seeing her onc or even having annual mammograms at the time. It took us all by surprise. We know that breast cancer is now being treated more like an ongoing problem to be watched and kept under control somewhat like Diabetes. So if your mom has been to her doctor and is not discussing her situation with you, you need to talk with her and tell her you are very concerned and fearing the worst. I certainly understand your last comment, my daughter insists she is fine when I know that is not true. She is doing ok with her treatments, but certainly not fine.

Hope you all get good news next week.
Hugs, MK

Regular Member

Date Joined Mar 2007
Total Posts : 58
   Posted 3/5/2008 9:57 AM (GMT -7)   
Oh sorry, I didn't make that clear. She's receiving treatment every 3 weeks- herceptin, zumeta (sp?!) and she's on chemo tablets. She's was put on the chemo tablets around 3 months ago but became so sick from them and lost so much weight, they stopped, but they restarted her on them again because her tumor markers are spiking, but is taking meds for the side effects...she's still really sick tho..Anyway, the other day she was in getting her treatment and she mentioned her back is really sore, so that's why they're sending her for bones scans to check her out...
I guess I hate not knowing the full extent of her illness. With myself, I know everything there is to know about my crohn's and crohn's disease in general, but I don't even know what stage cancer my mom has!!
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