Oh dear, hugs to you both Candy and MK. Sorry for all this garbage we have in life. It is something, eh?
My MIL died in January and at 76 she had dementia that was horrible at the end. My grandmother will be 103 a month from yesterday and she can hardly hear, see and is not really sure who her family is anymore. It is crazy all the ups and downs we have in life, like a crap shoot really. And my friend who was PG with triplets lost 2 babies and then got BC 14 months later. Seems the unfairness hits in clusters rather than sharing.
Anyway, BC has taught me strength and coping skills (That frankly I still would have preferred to do without), but hopefully you can use your experiences to help your loved ones.
Please keep us posted on your friend and your DD.