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Date Joined Jul 2003
Total Posts : 214
   Posted 10/26/2004 9:54 PM (GMT -7)   
I don't think anything can be simple when it comes to me anymore. Even my Onc agreed with me when I said * this is totally stupid, it makes no sense! This just isn't right* and he added * well, you have never been NORMAL.* in his lowered raspy voice. He is dumbfounded, as is everyone. He is determined to keep me going no matter what. He said * Don't you give up, b/c I am not about to give up on you. * So we are going to double team this crap. Not only will I remain on Aromasin, I am on Tamoxifen as well. This new BC is 60% ER/PR+. Where my other one was 6%. He did mumble about how he has not seen a case like this in his 25+ yrs as he was looking over the recent one of my bible sized charts. But on the bright side.....his office just got new chemo recliner chairs! They have massage and heat in them! Kind of makes the idea of chemo not so bad now if I need to do it. LOL I may go in there tomorrow when I get my port opened for my infusions and ask to use one for like 10 minutes. You have your own room, TV and  VCR.....I may never want to leave! YEAH, RIGHT!
Also, I am in the process of switching insurance plans within the same insurance company. DH is now getting GM insurance instead of Delphi insurance since he switched to a GM owned company instead of a Delphi owned company that has GM employees. ( that they are trying to scare them into a stupid contract. Dh just said forget it and switched to the GM plant ) So I get to keep my Onc and OBGYN. I have to switch PCP' biggie, EXCEPT he needs to give me a referral to see the surgeon. BUT, I have not even seen this guy yet! And I have an appointment to see the surgeon on the 2nd. The new PCP said he would work with me and get that referral since my Onc called him and spoke to him about this stupid situation right now. He also has to give me referrals for seeing the rads Onc b/c they are no longer in my plan, but my insurance says that is continuing treatment, so that is ok. Not that I am not confused enough on my own, and I have to process all this crap too. Not to mention all the time changes they did today on my scans for tomorrow. I think I am supposed to be there at 10am now. They changed it 3-4 times. I just had DH remember it. I wasn't even about to try. I totally forgot about visiting my friend, Melissa, today. She called and asked if I was on my way. And I said yes, onmy way to the hospital to get things straightened out. And she said * Oh, I thought you were coming over today at 2pm? * BIG Dory moment. So I am going over there on Friday! I told her to call and remind me that morning.
AND Dh is depressed and taking a sick leave from work. He will still get paid 90%, so thankgoodness for that. It finally caught up to him and this recent crap didn't help. ( notice I use *crap* alot..... ) Too much change at once I think. His job is physically demanding, he builds the double cab GMC trucks. It's over an hour away and he feels like he won't be here for me and Kalia if something were to happen. His words were*I used to be a phone call and 10 minutes I am a phone call and about 90 minutes away.* I have no idea how to help. I just listen. But I am happy that he isn't too proud to see a therapist. Although he has to b/c of his job so he can get paid. So he doesn't feel like he caved. MEN! But look who's I can come here and vent just like I am doing now. I told him we need to get a punching bag. My FIL was surprised when I told him today that I just wanted to yell and beat the *crap* out of someone or something about a week ago.( I am over that now...thanks! LOL ) Usually I am not that violent when I talk to him about it. It was funny. He just kind of chuckled b/c he knew i was fine know and I am the one always trying to keep him calm and relaxed about his cancer.
Ladies I am going to stop here.....there is more to all this crap like surgery date...scan results and more waiting coming soon. I told Dh and FIL we just need to go to Vegas for a few days. And we may just do that.
L&H, Shelley
*Just keep swimming*   Dory....Finding Nemo

Regular Member

Date Joined Jul 2003
Total Posts : 349
   Posted 10/26/2004 10:16 PM (GMT -7)   
Love you, honey. Just keep swimming--we'll all be right with you holding you up from under the surface of the water when you need it.
Glad DH is going to have someone to talk to.
Hugs, Michele
May this disease NEVER be allowed to take another wife, mother, daughter, sister, lover or friend........
I cannot control the wind, but I CAN adjust my sails 
You can choose to look UP or DOWN--it's all about putting perfume on a pig. It is still a pig and it STILL stinks, but it stinks BETTER!
Breast Cancer Chronicle Demystifying BC, one step at a time

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jul 2003
Total Posts : 2272
   Posted 10/27/2004 3:48 AM (GMT -7)   
Shells, more stress! Who needs it? I am glad your DH is going to get some assistance, I'm sure your health and the move have not been easy on him. I still believe that sometimes it is harder on the loved ones than on us...especially men who want to 'fix' things. He can't fix your cancer, but he can fix how he copes. We're all here for you, remember that!

As for the insurance woes, sounds like your onc will set the PCP straight. Advice- keep notes of who tells you what, especially the one that said you can continue with the rad onc. Sometimes claims are not processed properly in error, and it will help if you need to back-track.

Keep swimming, girlfriend....


Veteran Member

Date Joined Jul 2003
Total Posts : 1090
   Posted 10/27/2004 4:08 AM (GMT -7)   
I am still here. Same phone number and I am just a ring away. Call and scream all you want. I know I would be. Love ya. Joyce
People are like tea bags, you have to put them in hot water to see how  strong they are!

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jul 2003
Total Posts : 700
   Posted 10/27/2004 5:15 AM (GMT -7)   
{{Shells}} You can scream, vent or whatever you need to do here. That's what we are here for. We will be with you like Mikki said, so you hang in there. Keeping you in my prayers and thoughts.

Love ya
Sara Dearing
Today is a gift, that's why they call it the present!

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jul 2003
Total Posts : 1294
   Posted 10/27/2004 11:39 AM (GMT -7)   

"Crap" is right!!! I have you in my thoughts and I am so happy to hear that your DH has someone to talk to. It helps. Stay strong and keep us updated.

Love and hugs,

"A sister filled with joy preaches without preaching.  Joy is a need and a power for us . . . for it makes us always ready to go about doing good." 
                              Mother Teresa

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jul 2003
Total Posts : 702
   Posted 10/28/2004 8:23 AM (GMT -7)   
Hey Shells sure do have a full plate..."CRAP" seems like the correct response.
Remember, we are with you sweet friend...and just keep on swimming.

So glad DH is getting some help and has someone outside the family to talk to.
I think Las Vegas is a great idea !!

Love and Hugs

Sometimes it is a slender thread, Sometimes a strong,
stout rope; She clings to one end, I the other;
She calls it friendship; I call it hope....

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jul 2003
Total Posts : 892
   Posted 10/28/2004 8:40 AM (GMT -7)   
Shelley, yikes, talk about a full plate, I'd call what you have an overflowing platter. Hooray for your DH for seeking counselling. It's so impt to dump all the negative on someone else, but that someone else needs to be appropriate to the situation. A therapist surely is that. LV sounds like a great idea. Be sure to tell me when you're coming I'll come downtown to meet you. That would really be fun. L&H's, Luci
In the depth of winter, I finally learned that within me lay an invincible summer.  Albert Camus

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