I am usually a pretty level headed, emotionally controlled woman. But, the last month has shown me that I am not this woman at all. It seems that any little thing will make me cry or totally lose it. I am presently on an antidepressant (just started it this week). My weekly chemo treatments are nothing that I can't handle. I have been on the same chemo since I was diagnoised with a recurrance in Nov, 2003.
I was told to attempt to get rid of things that were causing me stress. Okay, I finally eliminated the largest stress problem..my mother. She was diagnosed in Aug with Bells Pasley and even though my ds and db live w/in 3 miles of my mom, they did nothing to help with her care. You see, they are both VIP (or so they believe because they make 6 figure yearly income) and didn't have time to help drive mom to appts, or take her to dinner or grocery shopping, etc. Or answer her 20 plus phone calls each day. I finally said enough was enough and she was their responsibility. I didn't want visits or phone calls. You see, she refused to believe that I was in treatment again. My db and ds have not been interested in my health or treatments since the beginning 4 yrs ago when I refused to let them make my decisions for me. Pain is under control w/out having to take a great number of pain pills. That was something that I had to learn to do...take pain pills.
I don't know why I am so on edge constantly. Nothing satisfies me or is right. Anyone else ever had this problem? If so, I would love some insight as to how you handled it.