Sorry you got bad news, but if I must say, we are a pretty cool bunch to hang out with....your "slay the dragon" attitude will get you far, hang onto it....
My recommendations....bring a tape recorder (and a person) to your next few doctor's appointments. Under the stress and emotion, there is no way to really GET all of the information. I found it invaluable to go back later and listen to the tape recorded session, that way I could ask all my questions and not have to try and write the answers.
Don't hesitate to seek a second opinion. In my case, I met with the surgeon and then the whirlwind started....meeting with oncologist, rad onc, several tests and then I took all the information to a major comprehensive cancer center...to get their recommendations too. I ended up switching providers because they were eager to do the sentinel node biopsy, whereas the original surgeon was against it.
For me, knowledge was power. I read what I could handle, and it helped me to ask the right questions and make decisions. Please don't feel the need to rush into anything either...if you are not sure what surgery you want, take your time and be sure.
Another tool is to get copies of all your path reports and test results. You can start a file and I found it very handy to have access to these, plus it was empowering to try and read and understand them.
Take 1 day at a time....and know that you CAN do this! I was able to work throughout chemo and rads, it was no walk in the park, but it was very tolerable. We'll be here!