Playing catchup on teenytinytown

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Veteran Member

Date Joined Jul 2003
Total Posts : 829
   Posted 7/8/2005 7:37 PM (GMT -7)   
I have been remiss in recent months in reporting from this dust bowl, but things have been happening here. After months of trying organic fire ant killer, I appeared to have lost the battle. My middle child, Eric, comes up here and poisoned every one of the little things. A few have returned, but their number will soon be up.

Trees are dying here as are my plants. To make matters worse, MK calls me to tell me about their 4" of rain. I could spit on my weeds and that would be about how much rain we got.

I think that I have already reported to you that the city cops staged a drug raid on a meth lab but it was exactly the same spot that the school bus drops off kids. Perhaps it was just practice for a Keystone Cop routine. I do have a few questions about this, though. First, this is not the first time they have arrested the same person for the same thing. He then sets up shop on the main street only makes the shed the lab. No, the cops aren't going to get him again, are they? Judge keeps bailing him out, he keeps cooking up his junk.

And, I think I already told you about the 6-7 foot alligator that had taken up residence in a local farmer's pond. I feel real happy having a pond close to this house.

A local man made national news when he put some kittens in a box and sent them down the river. There was a lot of todo locally and battle lines have been drawn. Personally, I would be happy as could be if there were someone who could remove all the feral cats from my neighborhood. They are getting under my house, on my chairs, walking on my car, etc. Now I'm sure there are a thousand cat lovers out there but I am extremely allergic to them. I've already had one attack that sent me to the ER. There is NO ONE or NO AGENCY that can help. I may not agree with the kittens in the river but I can certainly see where he is coming from. I even tried using Fox urine, don't ask where it came from cause I didn't ask the seller. Nothing works.

A local town has arrested a football player for indecent exposure. The paper spent more time listing the tremendous wins the school has had with this kid than it did about the crime. One mother insists that the player be kicked off the team. Fat Chance, Lady. This is Texas and football is king.

Sorry, to be so lengthy but I had to save the best for last and if I'm lyin, I'm dyin.My weekly newspaper came today and it has "Front Page News". Bigfoot has been sighted in teenytinytown. Yep, the Yeta, Sasquatch or whatever you call it passes through here on a yearly migration. (I'm not making this up.)

There is also a local research center for sightings. The researcher goes into great detail about whether or not a sighting is real. Never having seen one myself, I found it interesting that he classifies them as Gigantopithecus which leads me to believe that he feels they were related to the 3 million year old skull named "Lucy".

They live in units where the newly matured males are run off and when one sees a Bigfoot, it is one of these males out looking for a female. (What did this guy do? Sit down and have a discussion. Has he ever heard of evidence?)

He claims they are omnivores, stealing the turkey and other birds shot by hunters. He also claims that many local farmers have seen them eating fruit from their trees.

I'm not normally out after dark and I will NOT be looking for Bigfoot. The only I would find in the dark is the pond, mosquitos, and God Forbid, another alligator.

Ladies, I have to live here. I had no idea there were people up here like this. It may very well be the water. I only use the bottled spring stuff. I know my neighbors must have thought I was crazy with my home made bee catcher but they've been hiding traits that are scary.

Sleep well, my friends. All the Bigfeet have migrated down here.

Ready to suggest the nuthouse, Jo-Ann
A good friend will bail you out of jail...
but a true friend will be sitting
next to you saying,
"Dâmn... that was fun!".

Regular Member

Date Joined Jul 2003
Total Posts : 319
   Posted 7/8/2005 7:53 PM (GMT -7)   

God Bless you and  your little town JoAnn

A couple of months ago in my little town we recently got a police car.  It's license plate read "MPD 1".   A couple of days ago I saw what I thought was  the local police car but found out we have two police cars.  The license plate on the rear.  "MPD 2".       Oh my.. this town is small. 


But so far.... no fire ants.  Had those in Tennessee... but that is another story for another time.


We have raced "for the Cure"
Worn Lee's Jeans on Friday "for the Cure"
Bought New Balance tennis shoes "for the cure"
Worn pink ribbon pins "for the cure"
Collected donations "for the cure"
Ate pink M&M's "for the cure"
Drank Sutter Home wine "for the cure"
Spent an extra $.08 on a stamp "for the cure"
Ate Lean Cuisine frozen dinners "for the cure"
We have all done our part "for the cure"
now you do yours and get us that cure.

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jul 2003
Total Posts : 1090
   Posted 7/9/2005 4:44 AM (GMT -7)   
i just wanted you to know how much i love your stories. even resorting to using on screen keyboard,waiting for dell tech. i had to let you know how much i love the characters in your town. if you spot big foot send him here if he speaks english and can fix toasters. my keyboard stopped working and i called now we all know how computer smart i am. add to the mix a person with limited abilities in english.i got the new board and still nothing.can not wait to see  what he will say next.and how long it will take me to understand. if you are a betting person place your bets. he does not speak english and i do not speak computer. this is going to be good. l and hugs joyce

How wonderful it would be to see Angels where there are only clouds. How sad it would be to see clouds where there are Angels.

Regular Member

Date Joined Jun 2005
Total Posts : 243
   Posted 7/9/2005 4:50 AM (GMT -7)   
Where do you live so I know not to pass thru there? Sounds like a Peyton Place. I don't care for cats either, but I wouldn't send them down the river in a box either. I might would gather them up and drop them off at the other end of town.

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jul 2003
Total Posts : 702
   Posted 7/9/2005 7:47 AM (GMT -7)   
Okay Sis

Some of my best friends are cats...!!! but I will forgive you since you are allergic to them....
That guy who put them in the box on the river is a total idiot !! Although there are a few people I would like
to put in a box and send them down the river...

Teenytinytown sure has alot going on....alot more exciting things than my "big City".....
I love hearing all the news.

Love and hugs

Sometimes it is a slender thread, Sometimes a strong,
stout rope; She clings to one end, I the other;
She calls it friendship; I call it hope....

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jul 2003
Total Posts : 2921
   Posted 7/9/2005 8:06 AM (GMT -7)   
What do you say we all go visit Jo-Ann in her teenytiny house in her teenytiny town and help these people look for Bigfoot? I could do that on my electric scooter and have a ball. Recently I went blackberry picking on my scooter and the people who owned the orchard called me a hot rod. It was only because I had not had much experience driving it at the time. Then I took the kids to the zoo and buzzed around there with the kids running behind yelling at me to slow down cuz they couldn't keep up. So picture the Bigfoot hunt, MK buzzing on the scooter and everyone running behind yelling at me to slow down. Even Bigfoot would be frightened out of his wits, but that old alligator just might join in the fun. Oh Jo-Ann your stories come all too infrequently, but we enjoy reading them none the less. Yes, we did have 4 inches of rain within a couple of hours Thursday. After no rain for one whole month, nary a drop, that 4 inches was indeed welcome. Hugs MK

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jul 2003
Total Posts : 2044
   Posted 7/9/2005 9:41 AM (GMT -7)   
Jo-Ann, love your reports from Teenytinytown. What an interesting place to live. Al least life is not dull. Hope you get some rain soon. Hugs, Lauri
"Go confidently into the direction of your dreams. Live the life you always imagined" Thoreau
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.

Regular Member

Date Joined Jul 2003
Total Posts : 324
   Posted 7/9/2005 11:09 AM (GMT -7)   
Gee, Jo-Ann, your teenytinytown reminds me of the line in "Wizard of OZ" -- "Lions, and tiger, and bears -- oh, my!"

Now, you can battle the ants, but please don't go huntin' fer gater!

Keep the stories coming. We love them!


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