Today I had my abdominal ultrasound, ordered because my blood tests revealed something abnormal with my "LFTs" I think it was called.. something to do with my liver. The biggest part of me has felt that all these other tests that have been ordered ever since I was diagnosed with cancer have been a waste. Maybe waste isn't the right word....the doctors ordering them are trying to rule out problems. I guess I mean that I feel that I know the results will all come back as showing nothing.
Remember, I was healthy as can be for 57 years, never having to go to the doctor except for sports related injuries that were always treated and resolved 100%. Well, I THOUGHT I was healthy-- there was breast cancer lurking. But then I thought with cancer there'd only be surgery, chemo, radiation, reconstruction...ta da! Back to my normal, very busy with sports activities life. But if the hideous GBS hadn't gotten me, just going through cancer makes you wonder if you're even sicker, because with blood tests every week during the months and months of treatment, any abnormality...even a really tiny abnormality that normally would not even alarm your PCP....will cause a test to be scheduled. I feel like every part of my body has had xrays, ultrasounds, CT scans--with and without contrast--all which came back normal (thank God). But always being sent for tests can make a person FEEL like a sickly person.
Tomorrow I am going for a consult about
getting a colonoscopy, because I am just slightly anemic, and have been for a long time. Well, I have a crappy diet!! I rarely eat meat or other foods that are rich in iron. I take an iron supplement, and that's probably what keeps me being only "slightly" anemic. Over a year ago one of my doctors ordered one of those at home colon test kits....So, the testing company sent me one... I sent back my sample and they said it was normal. (And the insurance company has refused to pay the bill for it! Almost $500. WHYYYYYYYY would they refuse?? I'm over 55, a doctor ordered the test..... why refuse? We've been battling over a year with Aetna about
this. They denied my husband's as well.) Anyway, it's my cardiologist that is suggesting I get a colonoscopy.....(I have a heart doctor now, even though I'm sure my heart has always been particularly strong because of decades of various aerobic activities, because the EKG or Echo, or EEG or whatever test ordered by my onc, which is mandatory before starting chemo, since the chemo can damage your heart, showed the slightest abnormality).... So I tell my cardiologist that the home test kit for colon cancer came back negative, and he says that just means that one particular sample has no blood in it... the gold standard for testing is the colonoscopy, and I've been anemic for over a year, so where is the blood loss? I am frightened about
getting this test done, which I'm sure must be several times the cost of the home kit, since Aetna denied paying for the first test. I'm going for the consult tomorrow and expressing to the office manager my concern that she makes sure she confirms with Aetna they will cover this. Supposedly this was done with the home kit, but we know how that turned out.
Previously my fill ups for my tissue expanders for my breast reconstruction were done one week apart. When I got this one done on Monday, she said she was going to wait 2 weeks before doing the next one, to make sure my body accepts it and there's no unforeseen reactions. So GBS is going to slow down how fast I get fill ups. I understand but it's frustrating. I am SOOOOOO blessed to be 90% recovered from GBS in such a short time, there are many more horror stories out there of people with GBS that last years and years with complete paralysis and living on a ventilator. However, I am realizing that for the rest of my life, just having had GBS will always affect me. I run the (low) risk of it just spontaneously returning, and the somewhat higher risk that any future surgery could trigger it, or ANY virus, that I ever get, for the rest of my life, can bring it back. And i'm going to be more likely to get sick in the first place as I can never get vaccinated for anything again!.
One more GBS story.... last night while watching TV with my husband I suddenly screamed in pain, and began sobbing profusely, tears streaming over my face. Of course my husband paused the show and rushed to my side and asked what was going on. I told him someone just took pruning shears to my right foot and cut off my second toe...... I was WAILING as I was saying it, as the bloody stump where my toe used to be was killing me with pain and throbbing. For the first time when one of these odd nerve things has happened, I did NOT take the blanket off my feet to reassure myself that it really hadn't happened. Two sides of my brain fight each other. One side received nerve signals that could ONLY be interpreted as the pain of having a toe cut off with pruning shears, and the other side, that has visual control, is saying, "Girrrrrl, you're in the safest suburb in Florida, and NO ONE invaded your home and is going at you with pruning shears!"
So I didn't look, but I did get my husband to get an ice pack to put on the "wound", and it took about
20 minutes for the sobbing to gradually subsist, and my foot to be numb from the ice.
Post Edited (exqualls) : 12/6/2017 9:39:58 PM (GMT-7)