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New Member

Date Joined May 2006
Total Posts : 10
   Posted 6/18/2006 11:22 AM (GMT -7)   
I posted a few times looking for advise for my friend who had a large lump and had let it go for a year and had no job or insurance, everyone of course was wonderful / with advise how to get her to go to a dr. She finally went and she has a lump 80% of her breast and it has broken through the skin, he told her to go to social services and get free help asap, he said she had to have chemo and or/radiation to shrink it before removal. She is going to go on Monday, but I am really doubting this will help, as she has no will to live, and from all the i have read, it is the will and the want to live that can help save you. Her husband died a bit back and she wants to be with him, atleast with a dr. he can send her to hospice and they can help her with the pain. It is so sad for a friend to not be able to do anything, she just wants to die..I cant even get her to write a will or tell her brother in law. i wish I could help...but she doesnt want it, I hope she gets the peace she is looking for, and thanks to all of you who posted coments for me

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jul 2003
Total Posts : 1294
   Posted 6/18/2006 12:45 PM (GMT -7)   
Your friend will be in my prayers. 
Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work: if one falls down, his friend can help him up.  Ecclesiastes 4:9-10

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jul 2003
Total Posts : 2044
   Posted 6/18/2006 10:14 PM (GMT -7)   
How sad for your friend to be in this situation. I am really sorry that she has chosen this path. But, I don't think there is anything you can do. At least she is getting some medical care. Unfortunately you can not make her do what she does not want to do. Accept the fact that the decision is hers. Hugs and prayers for both of you. Lauri

"Go confidently into the direction of your dreams. Live the life you always imagined" Thoreau
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.

Veteran Member

Date Joined Feb 2005
Total Posts : 730
   Posted 6/19/2006 9:21 AM (GMT -7)   

I am so sorry to hear about your friend's diagnosis. But, as you have said, she has given up and doesn't have the will to live. She is lucky to have you there for her. She will need someone during these next few months. The one thing that I want you to realize is that SHE has made her decision. You did EVERYTHING that humanly possible that you could do. It is not easy to sit by and believe that the choice that someone has made is the wrong one. Especially when you care for that person. Just be there for her. Let her know that someone cares for her. As you said, she wants to be w/ her husband and it sounds as though she will be soon.

I hope that she has gotten the help that she needs from DFS. She will need the medical coverage for meds, even if she has chosen not to have chemo. Sometimes radiation will help w/ the pain. It might be something that you can check out and discuss w/ her.

Please continue to come here and post and let us give you the support that you will need.

Again, she is lucky to have you for a friend.



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