As MK would say.....Breathe.
There's nothing to worry about yet. Today you are still the same person with the same issues and friends and loved ones, etc. Be yourself and remember: You could get hit by a bus tomorrow, how do you want your last moments spent, freaked out?
OK, enough of that. Down to business. Bring a tape recorder and a friend to the doctor's. You won't be able to retain anything. Try to get a needle biopsy as soon as possible because a biopsy's the only thing that truly tells you what you've got. If it's cancer, it's not the death sentence it was years ago. You'll have people here and probably in your town who are organized for supporting you. You get to be part of a club that no one wants to join, but there's lots of support. I pray for B9 results, of course, but speaking as a 3 year survivor, there's life after cancer.
Tell us about yourself, Married? Kids? Job? What! I was 38, married to an insensitive hunk (who almost got slugged more than once) and mother of a 3-year old son when I was diagnosed. It was pretty freaky, but I made it through with the help of the ladies on this board. Tell us more about you.
"Our greatest glory is not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall." -Confucius
Don't knock on Death's Door. Ring the bell and run. He hates that.