My Decision Today

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Regular Member

Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 45
   Posted 5/17/2007 9:02 PM (GMT -7)   
I've been feeling pretty lousy and like I didn't fit in here (or anywhere!) given my attitude but today my husband and I went to a new doctor, got another opinion from a new oncologist who was very understanding of my decision.  He wasn't pushy about what form of treatment or not that I want, but he did help us come to a decision that's been long in coming.
I went there fully prepared to shoot down his arguments about trying tamoxofin, but he didn't want to argue confused    ... What he did do was help us make a fully informed decision about tamoxofin and he had some suggestions about adjusting some other medications that we hope will begin to provide some relief for the multitude of physical issues I've been having.  It's not a total answer as I still have to find a new primary care doctor, but I feel that I'm getting closer and actually having some glimmers of hope.  We are guardedly hopeful that the use of the tamoxofin will be helpful in slowing the growth of the tumor and we are aware of the possible ramifications and percentages and statistics now.  Here's to hope!
I want you to know I've been reading the forums here, in a few of the sections since I seem to qualify for a few of them, and I don't know - it seems so many are struggling so hard and doing their very best to find solutions - and like I said, I just wasn't sure where or if I fit in anywhere .
The main thing I want to say is that I care about you people, that you have helped me and been supportive without even knowing it perhaps.  Thank you for sharing yourselves here.
Gentle hugs for all!
~ Peace, love and understanding ~

Veteran Member

Date Joined Sep 2003
Total Posts : 1373
   Posted 5/18/2007 7:00 AM (GMT -7)   
I was wondering about you and how you are.  I'm hoping you feel better about this doc.  That's real important, to feel good about a doc.
Now, as for this site and feeling like you don't belong anywhere, well, those troubling thoughts are pretty commonly felt at one time or another when we feel there isn't much to help us and are troubled.  Maybe you can attribute those thoughts of not belonging to your reactions and adjustments to this *$#@& illness, which usually brings depression along in it's wake.  Because you DO belong here.  In fact, I've missed your posts and was indeed wondering how you're doing.  Speaking as someone who has been paying attention to your journey through this traumatic process, I have to tell you, you sound down, maybe a talk with your doctor about comorbid depressive symptoms would help to address these thoughts.   You don't need to be thinking that one of your supports is something your not entitled to.  Sometimes when we're in it we don't see the forest for the trees (sorry for the cliche, couldn't help it. it just fit there too well.)
Get a PCP if you can't go to the one you went to before, and tell them what's going on.  Depression goes undiagnosed so often because the sick one doesn't report on themselves or their thoughts.
"Our greatest glory is not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall." -Confucius
Don't knock on Death's Door.  Ring the bell and run.  He hates that.


Veteran Member

Date Joined Jul 2003
Total Posts : 2921
   Posted 5/18/2007 7:11 AM (GMT -7)   
Hey some days I don't feel like I fit in here, either! I was diagnosed a long time ago and have had no further problems but I have a lot of friends here I care about so I keep plugging along trying to do something to help. Everyone has different issues with breast cancer and with other health problems which may or may not be related. No one is the same here. Ages are forty years span or more. Life styles are really different, some have more $$ than others. Education is from PhD to high school levels. Married or not? On and on. We used to laugh when we had get togethers how none of us would probably be friends if it weren't for the fact we found ourselves together on a breast cancer forum. We laughed and had a good time in spite of our diversities. So, sure you fit in here. If you need help with something someone will be around to help in some way, perhaps not exactly what you need but close. Just hang in here! Hugs MK
PS I forgot to congratulate you on finding a doctor you think will work well for you.  That is a huge step.  Now I hope you can find a primary doctor who will be a good fit, too.

Regular Member

Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 45
   Posted 5/18/2007 9:44 AM (GMT -7)   
Much much gratitude! Thanks SO much.
~ Peace, love and understanding ~

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jul 2005
Total Posts : 688
   Posted 5/19/2007 12:13 AM (GMT -7)   

Iam one of the relative newbies here (almost 2 years) and let me tell you that u=you indeed fit in. Iam another one that has been following your journey with much interest. I have to apologize that I have not posted as much as I used to considering all that I have been battling. I always enjoy reading everyones posts and then trying to cheer or give advice. I have to admit that you do sound a little down too, Im not sure if you would ever consider it but there are alot of drugs that will help. I have been on anti depressants for years, and have NEVER mentioned it here before. There is a time in our life when we just cnat pick ourselves up like we used to. Having said all of that being diagnosed with cancer is quite a blow to your life so maybe some yoga or just good old chocolate would do.

We care about you, so don't go anywhere!


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