How much is mental?

I have been sick for over a year now- the only diagnoses is CFS.  In the beginning it was so bad I was so dizzy I couldn't drive for six months.  I can't even explain how sick i was. I am still sick today- just not as bad.  The mind boggling thing is that about 5 years ago my uncle had what seems to be the same thing.  He was actually passing out a lot.  He had all of the other same symptoms as me.  Weakness, headaches, fatigue, sore throat, feeling very sick, muscle pain, brain fog- I could go on and on.  After 4 months of being out of work- he was given the choice of coming back to work or being fired.  He had no diagnoses at all. He was tested for everything.  He has a family to support so he had to go back- he said he would have to pull over many times while driving to work due to feeling like passing out.  The thing is after 6 or 7 months he got better.  He is 20 years older then me. I am in a situation where I don't have to work- I stayed home for 11 months.  I am still somewhat sick.  My fiance says my uncle had no choice but to get better so that is why he did.  Does anyone agree with this?  How much does our minds play into illness?

mind plays a huge roll in all of our lives and well-being. can't deny that. my doctor says that its kind of like a 'what came first, the chicken or the egg' kind of thing. if u feel bad (spiritually, emotionally, mentally) ur body can become physically ill. if u become physically ill u can start to feel emotionally/spiritually/mentally bad. and its just a vicious cycle. he said this to me in a very careful way as to not upset me because how many times have all of us with CFS been told by doctors that its all in our heads? its not. and he knows this. CFS is a physical illness. my blood tests, adrenal test, etc. show that it is physical. but mind deffinately plays a roll in how ur body deals with it.

I'm not sure if that's even possible to answer. Seeing has how there's no real information on what your uncle had or how he got better, and he's only one example, it's hard to then make the jump that it's mental. I HATE HATE when people say "he/she decided to get better and then they did".

Ya know why I hate it so bad, it's because that's what I used to say before I had a clue about what what this disease can do to a person and how it impacts their life. I'll admit there's a fair amount of mental combat that has to go on with depression simply because doctors tend to brush it aside, and friends/family take the approach of "you don't look sick.. so what's your problem", and the lack of energy to simply socialize creates some isolation.... but I don't believe the onset of CFS or similar problems are created mentally.

The only mental part of it for me is trying to be as positive as possible and avoid depression. If I get sucked into depression (which I've done many times before) then that becomes a big hurdle to getting better - but overcoming it doesn't assure getting better. I think I rambed some.. and the above is just my opinion - I could be wrong.

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I was afraid some people might take my post negatively. I didn't mean it that way. I have been suffering for over a year- this illness is more thanfatigue- my symptoms have been so severe that at times I would rather feel death then to live like this.  I still get that way now.  All the while I have people saying "You don't look sick"  I have lost 15 pounds and people are actually jealous of that.  I would trade the 15 pounds for my health believe me.  I just thought it is strange that my uncle and I had (have) the same symptoms and he got better faster then me and he is 20 years older.  I have pushed myself back to work in hopes of it helping me get better. I have fallen into the depression- I developed severe anxiety- it was horrible at first I thought I was losing my mind!!  I just hope recovery is in store for all of us!!

I think it's 50/50.

aquarias, please don't take my comments as negativity towards you or your post, I think I was venting some anger at myself over how I used to simplify things with regard to illness when I really didn't have any idea. So... please please don't take it in any way as directed at you - I'd rather delete my post than give that impression.

I'm glad you posted because I believe we all need to talk about what we're going through and how others in our life are interacting with us. I know the struggle you're going through. I push myself to work each day and I feel like I'm getting nothing done - it's difficult to concentrate and focus - and I too struggle with anxiety now too. I have to force myself to go out and socialize because I've spent so long NOT socializing that I got a severe social anxiety.

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Sparker- no worries!!  How long have you been sick?  I still have social anxiety when I am in groups- but it is getting better.  I am so sick sometimes I feel like I am in another dimension- but I still keep pushing myself to get my life back!! I never knew how good life really is until I got sick. I took my health for granted.  When I get better I will never do that again. This illness really opens your eyes!!

i hope you didn't take my post as negative either. believe me, all of us here are for support. i was just saying what my doctor told me just last week when i went to him. and i respect him very much, he's very wise. i didn't wanna hear it that my feeling and outlook on life could be a part of whats keeping me from recovering. and only a part, there are many factors. i had been doing better in the past year (i was outta school, hah, that's probably why. stress is a *****) but now that i'm back in school i've been getting much more sick. stress and anxiety is HUGE in physical health. i also struggled with depression and thankfully am able to tell when my thoughts and feelings are getting into that "pit" that is depression enough so that i can catch myself and work with my thoughts to keep from getting back to that point. (everyone's different thought!) please don't think that any of us here are telling you that you should be able to will yourself back to health. that's unrealistic. the best you can do is have a positive outlook on life and a positive spirituality. don't push yourself TOO hard though.
(here i go quoting my doctor again) my doctor told me about a year ago, and i found it to really help me, that there are four elements/factors to good health. 1. Spiritual health 2. Emotional health 3. Mental health 4. Physical health
they're all intertwined and using that as my reference and guide you have to check yourself. is my spirituality positive? are my emotions positive? how is my mental health? how is my physical health? if one is out of place it can cause another to be out of place. you know? well those words just really helped me and i use it to keep myself in check. understanding it is important. maybe it'll help you too.
Stay Positive and Optomistic!! :)

THis is a great topic. I'm a strong believer in the mind/body/spirit connection. That being said, CFS is a physical disease and I think too often we hear the message from family, friends, and even doctors that it is "all in your head" and that if you would just exercise, or get out more, or take this wonderful vitamin, etc, you would feel much better. So let me just say that none of your symptoms are "in your head".

I know that when I first got sick, doctor wanted to attribute it to depression and kept trying to convince me that I was fatigued due to depression. I kept telling them that the only reason I felt depressed was because I was too fatigued to do the things I loved to do and often times too fatigued to function. If I was able to do the things I loved to do I wouldn't fel depressed.

Do I think your state of mind has anything to do with trying to cope with this illness?....Yes. I do think having some sort of hope helps keep people going. I have times when I get really down, but through it all I still have hope that maybe one day I'll be able to get back into running again (or at least slow jogging). Without hope, there isn't much.

That's just my two cents worth on the subject.

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aquarias, I've been suffering for at least 5 years. I think perhaps longer but definitely wiping me out in the last 5 years. The first two years were the worst, with everyone giving me advice like hippimom2 said, I can't tell you how many times I heard I needed to exercise or something else without any knowledge of what I was going through. The beginning was hard too because I was trying to live like I used to and that only made things worse.

The multiple doctors I was seeing had me all convinced it was depression, much again like hippimom2 said. I kept telling them I knew when I was depressed, and this was most definitely not it. I was getting depressed from being sick, not the other way around.

I now make sure I deal with my issues separately, the fatigue and any depression that comes with it. My anxiety was definitely a result of my isolation and depression. I hear you on the feeling like you're in another dimension. I've sat at my desk sometimes at work and felt like I was just completely detached from what was happening around me. Music was the only thing that gave me any comfort.

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