Posted 5/9/2007 5:08 AM (GMT -7)
I started seeing a sleep doctor due to insomnia and fatigue, and he referred me to a sleep psychologist. I started getting up at the same time everyday. Here's something I wrote about a week ago, before considering CFS as a possibility.
[quote]Things are going both good and bad for me right now. I have no trouble waking up on time or getting to sleep at night, but I feel like I could fall asleep standing up from about 3 to 6:00 pm until I go to sleep (earlier if I don't take my second dose of adderall). By the time my head hits the pillow, it's more like I'm passing out than falling asleep. Other people comment that I look like I'm about to fall asleep, blah, or really tired when they see me. I'm also having some memory problems even during the day. I'll think that I should do something and I go to do it, but then realize that I already have. I have difficulty talking to people because I can't find the words I'm looking for and forget what I was saying. This is especially troublesome when I'm working because my job requires a lot of technical knowledge, and people often ask me questions that require use of this technical knowledge.
It has been like this for years, even before I started taking Adderall. If I don't take some sort of stimulant, I have a very hard time functioning (this is why I used to take ephedrine). It's like I have no life skills. I lack the energy and alertness and motivation to take care of every day chores and errands. Even the simplest things like taking a shower or eating seem like they would take a WHOLE lot of effort. Working full time is next to impossible. I see doctors for fatigue, and after testing for anemia, thyroid problems, diabetes, etc. they say I'm probably depressed. I've experienced depression to varying degrees, and this is not like that. I'm just sooooooooo exhausted and out of it. Sometimes I feel weak too, for example having to ask for help opening something that most people shouldn't have any trouble with at all. My life starts to fall apart, and that's when I cave and start taking a stimulant again. I can once again function (until it wears off for the day), but after a while I start to fear for my short and long term health and feel guilty about being dependent on stimulants. I then decide that if I could just go without them long enough, and eat right and exercise and go to bed early, I wouldn't need to take stimulants. The cycle starts over again.
Then a few days ago I wrote this (also before considering CFS as a possibility):
[quote]I've seen doctors over the past few years because of fatigue, but the tests I've gone to the doctor to get have all come back normal... multiple tests for thyroid problems, diabetes, and anemia, an MRI to look for MS, growth hormone deficiency, etc.
- extreme fatigue and tiredness
- asking a question, and then forgetting the answer and asking again once or twice more a few minutes later
- asking a question, and then forgetting that I even asked it and asking again once or twice more a few minutes later
- weight gain
- a "double chin", sometimes worse than other times
- losing things
- confused mental state, sometimes more so than others
- remembering that I'm supposed to do something and then going to do it, only to find I already did (mostly at work)
- thinking that I'm supposed to do something and then being reminded that I don't need to because of other factors involved (mostly at work)
- often feeling very out of it, foggy
- forgetting what I was about
to say or even in the middle of saying
- not knowing how to communicate something that shouldn't be difficult to communicate
- having a hard time finding words, especially work related technical terminology
- chronic low grade fever that's usually but not always there
- off and on chills
- off and on blurry vision
- double vision in one eye, especially with lights (might be unrelated)