Nice day but paying for it now.

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Regular Member

Date Joined Apr 2008
Total Posts : 184
   Posted 4/22/2008 12:35 AM (GMT -6)   
sad  Hi All,
  A tale to tell for all who care to read. I felt pretty good this A.M. pain level of about 4 which is pretty amazing for me. My Sister calls and asks if I want to come up she lives not 5 minutes from here and my best friend of 48 years was there also. So I decided to go. I knew I would pay for it of that there was no doubt. However my sis has been angry with me for not coming to her home to visit. She can't comprehend the effect it has on me and takes it personal. Things flare up but they also are mostly ok.
  I went and we all had a great time and I was there with my sis for over 2 hours. Then the pain hit me, I honestly had to grab a chair while she held me up for a few minutes. It was bad. I had to take my many pills and stay for another hour before I could drive home. I came home and hit the bed. Tonight moving is painful, being is painful, walking is past painful. At the moment I can't help wonder if it was worth it. How sad that is, right? It will be days before I'm anywhere near that 4 pain level and will be at the 8-10 level till than.
   I love my sister but the last time the situation came up about going to her home she said it was ok just don't expect to see her at my home. I guess I agreed to disagree, it's my way. I so
   I also could see the look of pity in her eyes when she realized how much pain I was in and I hate seeing people I love looking at me that way. So much pain and hurt in the eyes of the people I love.
Is this common for any of the rest of you and do you have any ideas on how to heal the rift in a more permament way without alienating my other family members? Anywhoo thanks for giving me a place to vent and be heard with out having to leave my bed. Love Peace and No Pain this is Toritoo and I am definitely out. Goodnight.

Elite Member

Date Joined Apr 2004
Total Posts : 23551
   Posted 4/22/2008 6:17 AM (GMT -6)   
Does your family members know exactly what is wrong with you and the type of pain you are in? If not, maybe you can write a nice long letter explaining what is wrong with you and how you are coping. I found that once with my Ulcerative Colitis and I was trying to get people to understand, I used comparisons to help them. Such as with UC it feels like when you have the flu and running to the bathroom 20xs a day but it doesn't last one or two days but for the rest of their life - they sort of had a light of understanding bloom in their eyes. So if you can make a comparison that many people have experienced then they are more then likely to have an inkling of what you are going thru. I don't think we can avoid the sympathy look - but we can educate others and ask for compassion and empathy. Maybe once they understand then they won't be expecting you to travel any more then you have to and come to you instead.
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~Left sided Uc-'92-Colazal(9 daily),6mp(50-100mgs),Prilosec,Biotin,Forvia,Pro-Bio**Unable to tolerate Asacol, Rowasa or Canasa**~Allergies-Singulair
~Secondary Reynauds Syndrome-'04-Norvasc~Spinal Stenosis~Sacroiliitis-epidural injections
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