Good morning,friends, Well, this is my 2nd attempt to post. First one,words highlighted blue,then proof it was gone. So, I'll try one more time. If it doesn't work this time,then I guess it wasn't meant to be!!
I had an appt. yesterday. He wants me to do PT 3 x's a week for 4 weeks. I asked when I could return to work and he said that we'll discuss it when I go back to him in a month. I was a little disappointed. I was told recovery time for the surgery was 6-8 weeks. Now it is looking like 9+ weeks. I am ready to go back. But I know I am not able yet...I told him that my back pain is better. But I am still hurting in my hips and buttocks alot and the pain is worse on the left side. That is why he wants me to do the PT. I set my 1st appt. up for next Wednesday. I will do what he wants me to do. What choice do I have? I can't go back until he releases me,anyway. I know I have to let my body heal and recovery properly. I just wasn't planning on it taking this long...I did tell him that I am walking, just not the 3x's a day he wants me to. I have done it a couple times, but it increased my pain alot and it just wore me out,completely. But I will get there.I have been walking atleast twice a day. I will get there.
I have to call my nursing supervisor, the office manager and the short term disability lady today and explain what he said. I sure hope they don't replace me and I lose my job! I have been there 13 1/2 years. I love my job and the children. I do miss it alot. I was telling a friend that most people would be glad to have this much time off, and would be kicking up their heels. But I am not most people. I haven't enjoyed this at all. I have been hurting more than I have ever hurt in my life. And I am not a tv person. I very seldom even turn it on during the day. That is probably because I work in peds. I relish quiet time. Just the sound of tv gets on my nerves. I spend most of the day on the computer or reading. And I am fine with that. I will try to watch some tv and see if it's any better for me now... I know that sounds strange, as many of you enjoy it. But that is just the way I am.
It seems like before, the day would go by so slow. And now it seems to go by too fast. It doesn't make any sense to me. I just don't understand that...
I am trying to work on myself a little. It seems that I complain too much. I am going to try to focus on the good things in my life,the things I am thankful for,the people who love me. And try
to complain less. It is quiet challenging,but I am still going to try.
Husband and I had a "come to Jesus" meeting over the weekend. I had my aunt to pick up my son on Sat. and she kept him until Monday. I know how sensitive he is when it comes to me. I was crying sooo much and I didn't want him to see me like that. My daughter is 4 and she never knew anything was wrong... Anyway, I told him if he didn't bring a paycheck home on Friday and EVERY week from now,that he would have to leave this house. I would take nothing less than that. He was a man and he should support his family. It wouldn't be my fault that he had no place to go. I simply don't care! I told him to get all the adult material out of this house! I would not tolerate that any more. It made me sick to my stomach. If he needed professional help on that, I would help him seek it. But that behavior will not be allowed here anymore. I know it was a huge addiction, but it was one he brought on himself and he would have to deal with it. He did bag up everything and it went to the trash. So far, he has done okay with it. I haven't noticed anything on the computer. I know the sites he was going to and I had them blocked! He is working today. So we'll see what happens on Friday. I explained to him that I made it alone before I met him. And I could make it alone, without him again. But there were going to be some big changes he was going to have to make...It all depends on him...
I am going to bed for awhile. I have a migraine and need to sleep it off.