Hi Anice,
OMG, gal you need to take a big deep breath. You have simply got to quit beating yourself up over this surgery bit, its not helping you any at all, its adding to your stress level. My goodness lower your expectation bar some-cut yourself some slack. You are still considered fresh from surgery, I know you are sick and tired of hearing this, but its the truth. Stop the what ifs, concentrate on now. You are doing nothing but overwhelming yourself.
One of your biggest hurdles you need to get past is the surgeon saying you would be back to work so soon after surgery. Why this clown told you this is beyond me. But, you must forget about what he said about being back to work so soon. You are dwelling on this too much and its ragging you out. Change your mind set. Set your goals to building your strength and energy to get yourself back to work. Now, you already know it has not happened, so move forward. Try to set your own goals. You are suppose to walk 3 times a day, you are not-so make that your goal to get to walking 3 times a day. Once you achieve that goal move to the next one. You are spending too much energy trying to worry about next week, next month and wearing yourself out. That is leaving you without the energy you need to work on the things you need to be doing now. People recover differently from surgery, no one is alike. Please remember what I posted to you earlier, I never saw a lam patient go back to work any earlier than 3 months and this was after completing PT for as long as 6 weeks some even went 8 weeks because they went into a work hardening type program which is different than regular PT. This also depended on their type of employment.
I know about the muscle spasm thing going on and I so hope you will call and speak with the nurse at your surgeons office Monday morning if you have not already. If this does not pan out then go see your PCP, if nothing else see your pain mgt dr if needed. Keep in mind it does take muscles relaxers several days to get in your system at a constant level to work effectively. In other words, if your are rxd to take one say every 6 hrs then take it that way. Not one as needed, it will do you no good doing it as a hit in miss especially in the very beginning. Once it is in the system good it can effectively reduce the spasms if it is one that will work for you. I know someone on the other post mentioned Soma but the drs have pretty much stopped rxing it around here and have not done so in years. It seems people were abusing it very much like Vicodin & Lortab which are the same meds. If you are using a dry heat, you really need to invest in a moist heating pad, moist heat is so much better than dry. They are not expensive at all. Secondly, if you can find it and Walmart, Walgreens usually will carry it, try finding a muscle creme called Tiger Balm, does not smell real pretty but its an excellent muscle rub. My phyical therapist used this on me after my massages and then put moist heat packs on me and I felt like I had died & gone to heaven. Its feels wonderful. Get hubby to put some of this on your back careful about the incision area, have him rub it in very, very lightly, put some of this on the calves of your legs, especially use it all on your hip areas as well. Give it a try. I have to wonder if you are spending too much time on the heating pad. I was told never to spend more than 20 minutes at a time on a heating pad. I always do this after my evening shower. It will not help nerve pain but it sure does help my muscle pain. You have nothing to lose by trying this. Tiger Balm is not expensive either. It comes in a tiny jar like Carmex for your lips. A little goes a long ways too.
Anice, you had a wonderful attitude before your surgery. I know it feels like your world is crashing down around you because in 4 weeks you were not returning to work full blast and feeling like a million. Buts, thats ok, you only listened to your surgeron. You banked on doing just what the dr said. In reality you just need to give this time to heal properly. Even a laminectomy is a big deal ok. Oh, I know the drs downplay lams as if they are nothing but guess what they are wrong. Spinal surgery is a big deal. It is not like going and getting a tooth pulled ok. Another thing I do not think has hit you is; your first day back at work will be a killer. By noon that day you will be worn out and most likely in pain. I am not trying to scare you, I am trying to tell you what happens the first day back at work after surgery, it does not matter what kind of surgery either. Every time I have had surgery and I have had many that first week back is tough, but it does get better as time goes by. Yes, I do believe you will go back to work, it just taking longer than you anticipated. But, facts are facts, now set your own goals and get it done, you can do this, it just needs to be done in a more realistic time frame.
Here is an example, I had gallbladder surgery done as a lap, my surgeon insisted I stay home six weeks. I felt good at 4 weeks thought sure he would allow me to return to work-no way would he allow it. Everyone I knew that had gallbladder surgery, drs made them stay off 6 weeks. Now thats for gallbladder surgery. I cannot fathom 4-6 weeks on back surgery. My first day back to work was a killer too but it got better. You would be amazed at how the anesthesia affects the body overall. Its really hard on our bodies, have you thought of that at all? There are so many factors involving surgery that we do not think about that really does affect our recovery process. You probably think you are in good shape physically, you are not, this surgery takes it out of you and away from you. This where PT will come and help you regain and rebuild what you lost while off and at home.
PA mentioned maybe your activities are causing some of your symptoms, I think she is right. If you are doing alot of sitting, you need to stop. Sitting puts a tremendous amount of pressure on the spine. You need to alternate laying down, standing and sitting. My surgeon does not allow his fusion people to sit the first six weeks after surgery, now that is for a fusion. They are alloed to sit long enough to go to the bathroom, eat and thats it. They go home lying down either in a car or ambulance and come back for their 6 weeks post op checkup the same way. He will not aloow them to ride in a car the first 6 weeks either except to get home from the hospital. He limits the lam people on sitting too. The reason he does this is because of the stress sitting puts on the spine.
I am not trying to be harsh here, I am trying to help you. I know that you have it in you to do well with this surgery, but you ran into speed bumps that you were not informed about. But thats ok you just drive around them. Get yourself regrouped and be realistic, work on today, not tomorrow, not next week, today. Hugs, Susie