My goodness, that was alot of reading! You have had one heck of a hard time of things these last few years. Ive alot to tell you that is comming to mind! But , ill get important stuff out first.
A friend of mine needs one of her medications to be brand name too. She isnt wealthy or anything. So she contacted maker of the pill, and they were able to help her out with the perscription cost. Hey, every little bit helps. Thou, it sounds as thou youve probably had just about enough of those patches.
When it comes to your primary care physician I want tell you that how you describe him is frightning. It doesnt "seem" to me that he understands the gravity of his decisions on your life. That alone, would frighten me to no end. Perhaps your pain management doctor has a "recommendation" of who he/she works well with. In my case, all of my doctors work together. I know they are an odd bunch. But they are men and women I trust with my life. They would not hurt me. You should not stop looking until you find someone who understands you as person as well as the physical barriers our "shells" present. It is okay, and totally normal to not like a doctor and his/her manner of praticing medacine. Sometimes, for what ever reason, two people just dont quite see eye to eye. (kinda worried about that guys other patients thou, my gosh)
As to the scoliosis. I have something they call levoscoliosis. It is my understanding that the degenerative / arthritic changes can cause alot of pain. I too get injections. Though I get them regularly.. sorta. Sometimes works a little longer like 4mos. Another time I made it to my procedure appointment having never gone above 6 pain level. So that really really good. But, at first, some would work a little while, other areas stayed relativly pain free entire time. So the start up is slow. My start up, to get to where I am now, took about 3mos. from my first appointment with spine specialist. Hang in there and know he is trying very hard.
Looks like you and I have had similar therapies. You said soemthing thou, and wanted to ask about it. In refrence to your "tremors" you said.
"More than a few doctors have told me that it is unrelated so I have to defer to them. "
It would be a very good idea to bring this up during your visit. If he doesnt already notice on his own. I bet he can help. If nothing more, than to steer you in the right direction.
On this last part. I think it is important to tell your doctor about this ~~~>
"Your insight here is very helpful. I did not think it would be good to tell him/her that I am suicidal, partly because that's not quite the way it is. It is hard to explain well and I am afraid I would be judged before I could get it worded properly. I may be overreacting a bit but it is because I have NEVER had thoughts like those in my life."
It IS super important to tell your new doctor that part. You know how many differant things can miss fire, or over produce / unproduce in the human brain / endocrine system? Alot I tell you. Serious. Think about it this way... Basically when were in pain our bodies are in a high state of alert. And ALL the time. There are SOOOoOOo many things that can happen in our horomones and glands with chronic pain patients. I knwo that part is awful reality.. BUT! These pain management docs? They know their stuff. Know precisly what to do. What to test for. Wouldnt it be just silly to find out it is all perfectly okay, and they know what to do about it? Without ruining your life (dont you just love the way TV / Movie portray stuff?) Any way. Give it some thought. If it is out of charater or only been happening this last year or two.. it would be well worth your while to bring up these feelings of confusion and desperation.
Hang in there. You can do it!